non habeo. canis meus id comedit.
do you commonly grasp warm pieces of stool?
perhaps you should consider actually answering an ad.
this is no imitation. removing the hot dog from the ultradog yields a better dog. behold -- ultradog, no dog.
a foolproof plan, my friend. you shall see.
gentlemen, see you at the bacchanalia.
good morning gentleman.
i thought a fashionably late entrance would enhance my appearance. when i got here, the bacchanalia was over and the nymphs had left.
if i might ask, when you brush your teeth, do you spit or swallow?
yep.
uh-huh.
mochaccino. actually, in the spirit of the pact, i do need to ask for your cooperation in one small matter.
whatever you hear about me, you agree.
you'll see. gotta go. sixteen minute round trip.
when was the last time you looked at the facilities here?
seduce her.
what do you suppose they're saying?
this is truly revolting.
easy, tiger. what's in there?
why is this?
charming.
first of all, it's mochaccino, and secondly. oohhhh!
come on come on come on.
okay. you can do this.
aaaaaaarrrgghhhh!
okay. i'm here for your dumb. dumb meeting.
at least i learned how to shit in school.
how come you have no date?
no, of course not, don't be ridiculous.
me too. for the most part.
nope. he pissed himself.
ah, stifler's mom! thank you for letting us have a great party.
i'm three sheets to the wind, ma'am!
oh no, no date. bathroom incident.
nevermind. you have anything to drink?
no, no, that's what the cretins drink. i mean alcohol, liquor -- good stuff.
single malt?
so. would you object if i said you're quite striking?
yes ma'am, i am.
neither did i!
i'll tell you, i've learned one thing: women, like wine, get better with age. of course, i have no frame of reference for this comparison.