it's very difficult for me to talk about my father, because in a sense i'm talking about two men.
one, of course, is the public isaac sobel, the eminent psychotherapist and popular author known to millions of readers around the world. laura, michael and ben's mother listen proudly to the eulogy.
the second isaac sobel is the private man -- my father -- dad. and for those of you who knew him well and knew our family -- well, let's face it -- my father was a psychotic, mind- fucking prick. an arrogant, abusive, ego-inflated -- a ringing cell phone interrupts him. jump cut to:
hello? the mourners mutter.
paul? i have to, uh, take this. this isn't a good time. vitti is disheveled, his hair messed, his shirt buttoned wrong.
i can't talk right now. my father died!
call me later --
i can't believe he's gone.
okay, i might have strayed from my notes a little. i'm dealing with a lot of stuff here. grief is a process. laura notices fbi agents cerrone and miller waiting for them in the living room. cerrone is an attractive woman in her late twenties, wearing a dangerously-short skirt. miller is a clean-cut man in his thirties.
thank you, i'm going to miss him
i mean -- there were issues -- as, i think, there are with any father and son. he wasn't especially warm --
no, i'm just saying, in spite of all that -- agent cerrone crosses her legs, a move that does not go unnoticed by ben and michael.
-- he was a great, great legs. man.
what makes you think paul vitti called me?
then yes. he did.
yes.
michael?
she's with the f.b.i. she needs to know these things.
did i say that?
no, we're fine.
she's grieving. it's a process.
oh, yes. paul vitti and i were involved in some organized crime activity a couple of years ago. i mean, i wasn't involved -- not 'involved' involved -- i was just trying to help him therapeutically, and some people tried to, uh, kill us. no big deal.
what kind of breakdown?
that would keep a parade pretty calm. he just keeps singing west side story songs?
the balcony scene? both parts?
paul, it's me. ben sobel. paul? maria?
oh, boy. what's going on, maria?
paul? paul? ben waves a hand in front of vitti's face. nothing.
really. can we take him to an examining room?
you already did a neurological work- up?
completely catatonic -- he pulls on vitti's ears and nose. vitti does not react.
totally gone. well, i don't think he's smart enough to be faking. street smart, yes, but we're talking about an i.q. just north of a bedroom slipper. ben checks vitti out of the corner of his eye. no reaction. then ben takes a sharp needle from an instrument tray.
so if i just stuck him with this needle, he probably wouldn't even respond.
okay -- he sticks the needle into vitti's shoulder.
paul, we're going to give you some tests to assess your mental condition. there's no pressure -- just answer as best you can. do i have your consent to share the results of these tests?
i'll take that as a yes. okay, i'm going to show you ten cards, each containing a picture of an inkblot. i want you to look at each card and tell me what you see.
focus, paul. you haven't seen the card yet. what does this look like to you? take your time. vitti looks at the wrong side of the card. it's all white.
no, paul, the other side. vitti turns it over and makes a face.
bat or weasel. all right.
see anything else?
pussy with teeth. next card.
now try repeating the numbers backwards. for instance, if i was 1- 2-3, you will say 3-2-1. okay, 7-3-8.
try again. 7-3-8.
just tell me what you think is going on in this picture.
screwing a midget. and how does the story end?
the wife or the midget?
okay, paul. last test. in this one, i'm going to start a sentence and you complete it any way you want to. ready? 'i get angry -- '
no, you're supposed to complete the sentence.
i wasn't asking if you agreed or disagreed; it was more like, 'i get angry when -- '
well, that about does it for me. cut to:
based on his symptoms and the test results, i'd say brief psychotic disorder -- if it persists, possibly schizophreniform disorder. and dr. cutler agrees with my diagnosis.
dr. cutler? no, he's annoying, but --
not crazy. at least not permanently. in certain people, continuous exposure to an extremely stressful situation -- soldiers in combat, for instance, disaster victims, a hostage situation, or being locked up in a maximum security prison with someone trying to kill you -- it can produce a temporary psychotic state.
a day, a week, up to a month -- if the precipitating stressors are removed.
he could get worse. he could deteriorate to the point where he'd be permanently schizophrenic.
you think they'll let him out?
well, couldn't you release him to a halfway house or some place where he could get some decent treatment? based on my earlier work with him, i don't think he's dangerous, and i think he was making a real effort to reform himself.
mine? me? no, this is a bad time for me. my father just died -- and i've got this bulging disc in my neck -- and we're redecorating, which is a total nightmare. i can't --
no, of course not.
no --
what? i can't be an institution.
yes. we're clear.
yes. cut to:
okay, paul -- this way. vitti comes out carrying an overnight bag, walking like a zombie. ben leads him over to the car and opens the door for him. vitti keeps walking, passing the car.
this way, paul. over here. here we go. ben helps vitti into the car. one of vitti's legs is still outside.
leg, paul. leg up. ben lifts vitti's leg into the car and closes the door. cut to:
i knew it! i knew you were faking! you used me to get you out of prison!
what are you talking about?
i was at the funeral home!
my father died!
are you hearing yourself?
yeah, i can see how touched you are.
i loved my father. i'm feeling a lot of grief right now.
decongestant. i'm getting over a cold. all right, what's going on? who's after you?
why "the wrench"?
off?
i'm sure they'd be flattered. so --
so what does that have to do with you?
maybe if you just explain to them -- that you're out of it now, that you're starting a new life --
you are, aren't you?
want to grab your stuff?
paul! i don't think you understand. you're in my custody. i could get in a lot of trouble if you screw up.
oh, no. you want to go back to sing sing? thursday's meatloaf night. i can have you back there in no time. the u.s. attorney was very clear. you stay with me; therapy every day; you can't leave the area without permission --
and you have to get a job as soon as you're well enough, which is now. so are you coming in with me or do i have to make a phone call? vitti relents and grabs his stuff from the back seat.
i didn't have a lot of choice.
i told you. he's in my custody. i'm a federal institution.
his wife and kids aren't here. they're in ohio.
his life was threatened and he didn't want to endanger his family.
honey, your teeth are fine. i know it's an imposition, but what could i do? i didn't want him here. they -
you'll have to forgive her. she's usually a great hostess.
emily fuckin' post. well, that explains why she rarely used her middle name.
what kind of friend? because if it's 'the wrench,' or 'the power drill' or any other kind of tool --
they won't stay late, will they?
i'm not -- this has nothing to do with laura.
we were having a disagreement. a certain amount of conflict is normal in a marriage.
or what?
paul --
remember, this is only temporary.
mike, can we talk for a second?
i know the last few weeks have been kind of tough with grandpa -- dying and everything -- and it might've felt to you like i didn't have time for you or i didn't care about how you feel.
good. because i want you to know that you can talk to me about stuff and that i can really listen and understand what you're going through.
and if i seemed a little hard on grandpa, it's just that your grandfather was a hard man in a lot of ways. he wanted everything done his way and sometimes i just felt like nothing i ever did was good enough. i don't want it to be that way with us.
and you know, at times like this we all might start questioning our own mortality and you might be thinking how devastated you'd be if i died. right?
that's good. good talk. and i realize it's all a little hectic right now, but this paul vitti thing is only temporary, okay?
that's not funny. good night, michael.
this has to be some kind of record, don't you think? it's been like forty minutes.
let them? how much longer can he go? another twenty minutes, i'm either breaking it up or calling the guinness book of records. the moaning shifts into low gear, more guttural and bestial.
that's not entirely true.
i have a 17-year-old son.
can i talk to you, please?
miss? excuse me. there's no smoking in this house.
what do you think you're doing?
well, it's a little hard with the live sex show going on in the guest room.
go to a hotel.
i'm not trying to punish you. these aren't my rules, but i have a responsibility here. besides, i thought you might like a nice home- cooked meal after being in prison that long.
that girl is not staying here.
oh, yeah, i'm really jealous.
we don't think it's necessary to wake the neighbors every time we have sex.
this is not a good start, paul. cut to:
i'm sorry. next time i lose a parent, i'll be sure to reserve the guest room. a door slams somewhere, then sheila storms into the room sobbing, her hair askew, tucking her blouse into her skirt.
paul?
why don't we go to my office? i'll make you a plate. cut to:
i know. all you did was flash everybody in the dining room.
well, when the paramedics revive my aunt goldie, i'll be sure to ask her. sit. vitti starts for ben's chair.
ah ah ah! he points vitti to the sofa and takes his own chair.
so what are you going to do, paul?
with your life.
okay, that's a priority. have you thought about what you're going to do for work?
come on. there must be something you like to do.
oh, sporting goods. we'll check the want ads tomorrow but don't get your hopes up. anything else?
who are you?
i know that. i mean what are you?
i just want to know how you see yourself.
just answer the question. what are you?
really? the boss of what -- jelly? you're not the boss of me. so what are you the boss of?
what am i doing, paul?
i understand.
you've spent your whole life becoming who you are and now you can't be that anymore -- that's gotta be scary. if you're not paul vitti the mob boss, who are you? vitti is at a loss.
well, let's think. when you were a kid, what did you want to be?
you must've wanted to be something when you were little -- fireman?
baseball player?
astronaut?
al capone?
we're not talking about me.
fine. i wanted to be a philatelist.
no, paul, i believe you're thinking of a proctologist. i wanted to collect rare and unusual stamps.
oh yeah. big time. so what did you want to be?
you afraid to tell me?
then tell me. i'm not here to judge you.
a cowboy. really?
so you watched cowboy movies and tv shows with your father.
sheriff dillon.
marshal. so who were your favorite cowboys?
paul!
interesting. they're all good guys.
no, that's important. you didn't want to be the bad guy. you wanted to be the hero.
so what happened?
so why didn't you become a cowboy?
something else happened when you were twelve.
something that made you very sad?
something else.
paul! your father was murdered! right in front of you. remember?
it's got everything to do with it. he gave you the cowboy suit. with a white hat. he was in the mob, but he wanted you to be a good guy, didn't he? vitti starts thinking about his father and starts to weep.
he didn't want you in the gang life. he only did it himself so you wouldn't have to. he was trying to buy you a better life than his.
well, paul, this could be a great opportunity for you. you're right back where you were when you were twelve. you've got some big choices to make. vitti fights to regain control.
it's not shit, paul. my point is, when you're a child, you think anything is possible. wouldn't it be great to think like that now?
i'm just saying you've got to keep an open mind and explore some new possibilities. try some different things -- maybe you'll connect with one of them. there's a career counselor i work with. i can call him for you. he may be able to help you find a job.
how do you know unless you try? suddenly one of the windows behind vitti shatters. ben dives for cover. silence -- then another rap on the window. ben looks out and sees jelly in the back yard, tossing stones at the window.
jelly -- what are you doing here?
that's great, jelly. i'd love to catch up with you -- outside.
and you, jelly -- you look -- did you get a haircut? i thought you were in prison.
how'd you get out?
what did he have?
that's not an illness.
where are you going?
what kind of stuff?
you can't leave without my permission.
that's it, paul. i forbid you to go.
if you screw this up, paul -- paul! the car pulls away.
shit! shit, shit, shit! ben turns and sees his aunt goldie on the porch.
is listening to vitti, but dressed as sigmund freud.
eins, zwei, drei!
acht gemacht gehunden nicht.
where are you going?
the hell you are. you're supposed to be in my custody. we have therapy today.
the one where you're mussolini?
the limp sword dream?
do you think this dream might be sexual?
i don't want to know that.
okay! i get it.
sex can represent a lot of things. in your case i think it's about performance anxiety. trying to find a job that fits.
you're hyperventilating.
breathe into this. vitti sits on a wicker chair.
excuse me?
hey, i'm doing the best i can! if you can't appreciate that, or if my best isn't good enough for you, then maybe you should find somebody else to talk to, you selfish prick! ben breaks down and cries what amounts to one racking sob, then quickly pulls himself together.
sorry.
i'm fine. i'm grieving. it's a process. ben takes a pill bottle out of his pocket and pops a couple of pills.
echinacea and goldenseal. do you know the tv show 'little caesar'?
the producer of that show is a man
meet him and find out. cut to:
this is not social. paul's meeting a television producer who might have a job for him. he's nervous and wants me here as a buffer. i'm a buffer, that's all.
he doesn't. he needs a buffer. i'm here in buffer capacity only.
no, that was something else.
laura? i'm a doctor? i think i know what i'm doing.
buffer. cut to:
bait! that's funny. honey, did you hear what paul just said? he said this is like eating bait.
like what?
oh -- this? i took a couple ibuprofen before we got here -- i shouldn't have had the saki. i'll be fine. it only lasts a couple hours. rah-oo. row. rowl. i guess you need both lips for that name. you know what i love about paul? he was born without a filter. he says exactly what he's thinking -- just lays it right out there. he doesn't edit himself.
see? he just told me to shut the fuck up. no filter. i love that. isn't he great?
wow. that would be incredible. did you hear that, paul? raoul wants to know if you'd be interested in working on his show as a consultant. you know, give technical advice, coach the actors --
got it.
hey, speaking of colorful -- this peacock walks into a bar --
and one for me.
what the hell was that?
it's my job. he needs me.
actually, i hear she was tough to live with. lot of parties, loud music -- lepers.
i am.
well, you know, it's a process. i mean, we had issues -- there's some anger -- but i'll work it out. laura goes to ben and embraces him.
no, i'm -- it's okay. ben sits heavily on the bed.
it's just a confusing time. i became a therapist because he was a therapist, so obviously his approval was very important to me. but is that the only reason i did it? i don't know. and now that he's gone, why do i keep doing it? is this what i really want? she sits next to him and takes his hand.
maybe you're right. maybe it's time i started focusing on me, and, you know, satisfying some of
no, that's not what i meant. i just need -- i don't know what. she puts her arms around him and holds him. cut to:
there must be some mistake. i didn't order a limo.
hello. i'm ben sobel. and you are -- ?
yes, sir. that's right. could you be careful, because i think they put the eggs on the bottom. he drops the bags heavily onto the bar.
who?
i can't discuss a patient's case with anyone --
i'd say he's still suffering from chronic anxiety and -- he hesitates.
we call it antisocial personality disorder. sociopathy.
meaning -- he -- fails to conform to societal norms with respect to -- lawful behavior.
he's got a -- criminal temperament.
well, i'm trying to at least show him the possibility of change --
we haven't really been introduced --
ben sobel. ben offers his hand but she ignores it.
a stromboni? that thing they clean the ice with at hockey games?
no, we don't want to do that.
me? no. i'm very attached to my balls. as you can probably tell.
yes, i understand completely. may i go now? i have perishables -- he takes his groceries and edges away. cut to: int. "little caesar" set - day vitti is sitting at a table with jelly and some of his main guys. from a distance it looks like they're playing cards. up close it's a different story.
jelly, hi. hey! yo-yo!
right. i was thinking of the cellist. how's it going?
that's great. have you seen paul?
his camper. cut to:
no, what are you doing here? i came to tell you we have a preliminary meeting with your parole officer and who do i run into? patty lopresti.
what is this -- a knock-knock joke? patty-who-kidnapped-me-and-threatened- to-cut-off-my-balls. stop lying to me, paul. your whole gang is here.
it's not that i don't trust you, i just don't -- trust you. are you lying to me? because i know you, paul. you'll say or do anything to get your own way.
oh, so now you're the victim? i want the truth.
say what?
i want the truth?
i want the truth!
paul --
i'm not an actor --
actually, i did the music man in tenth grade.
about being on the show? i couldn't -
it's not funny! there was no safety harness or anything. they could have dropped me.
i know exactly what that was about. you resent the fact that you've been put in my custody, so you passive- aggressively arranged things to make me look like a fool.
really? i was scared at first, but on the second take, i think i found some good stuff. i was able to texture the screaming --
oh, screw you, paul. just screw you.
don't worry about me. just worry about what you're going to say to this parole officer. what are you going to say? that you've moved out of my house. that you've got your old gang back together. for what, a high school drop-out reunion?
it's my business. i want to know. i'm a federal institution.
which car?
what do you mean, 'lose 'em'? vitti stomps his foot down on ben's, flooring the accelerator. cut to:
maybe i should just pull over. it could be the f.b.i.
what if we just stop and get out? they're not going to shoot us in broad daylight.
sorry!
we can't do this, paul! we have to stop! this is a lease!
it's a goddamn lease!
move over? where? vitti puts his left foot on the gas pedal and his left hand on the wheel.
seat belt. he releases the belt, then twists and crawls over the top of the driver's seat into the back, while vitti slides into the driver's seat. cut to:
it's gonna get worse?
they're right behind us! get away! he starts whipping things out the shattered back window -- a tennis racket, sneakers, an empty macy's box. cut to:
i wanted to save the crossword.
you think they'll get out?
where're you going?
but your parole officer --
i'm warning you. if you leave now --
that's it! i'm finished! you're on your own now, pal! i'm -- police cars and the fbi car screech into the parking lot and surround ben.
-- screwed.
i wish i knew.
i don't know anything. as far as i can tell, he's making a real effort to go straight.
i'm getting that. can i go now?
then can somebody give me a ride home?
jelly! where's paul? the guy in the suit turns. it's michael.
michael? what are you doing?
you got a job? that's great. look how handsome you look in that suit. what's the job?
oh, no, you're not!
i meant making sandwiches at the subway, not driving a getaway car!
i don't care if he pays you two hundred an hour, you're not doing it.
he had no right to ask you without my permission. where is he?
what do you mean you can't tell me?
you took an oath! oh, my god! was there blood involved?
i was in a car chase. there was a little shooting -- not that much really -- then they -- drove into the river. it wasn't as bad as it sounds.
tonight, i hope. i just have to find him and --
yeah, but he's an amazing lout, isn't he? i can't quit now. you know that.
i love you. they kiss. then ben turns to michael.
all right, where is he?
what club?
okay, mafiaboy, give me your car keys.
no, i'm borrowing your car. he kisses laura again and takes off.
jelly!
where's paul? jelly tucks a few bills into her g-string. she looks at ben and winks suggestively.
can you break a twenty? the stripper sensuously fingers the top of her g-string, and ben gingerly sticks the twenty in it.
do i just make my own change? he tentatively reaches for some smaller bills in her g-string but she dances away.
a ten and five ones -- when you have the chance. he turns around to talk to jelly, but he's already gone. ben finds jelly at a table with vitti.
okay, paul, what's going on?
i could ask you the same thing.
i do see a little pacino there -- around the eyes.
let's do what?
i'm not going until you tell me what's going on here. vitti violently shakes off ben's hand.
hey, guys. how's it going?
ben sobel. sorry, i can't move my head to the right. boy, i hope that's not permanent.
hi, carol.
oh, i'm not into that, fellas.
i think in is better.
wait! okay. go ahead. cut to:
i could fit you under my shirt. don't they have anything smaller?
nobody's going to be alive when this is over. what kind of plan is this? it's crazy. it's stupid!
you mean shoot it?
jelly --
couldn't i just take this?
ooh, cold -- cold. he jams his hand down the front of his pants and starts searching around in there. eddie and enormous bobby stare at him as they walk by.
my gun -- fell down in my -- he shakes his leg and the gun drops out of his cuff and clatters onto the floor. he smiles weakly and picks it up. vitti approaches. he looks agitated but under tight control.
you are making a huge mistake. you know that, don't you?
it's not your nature! you have a choice.
so i guess that makes me a real man now. what happened to the white hat, paul? your father wasn't wrong. you could be one of the good guys.
okay. vitti walks off. cut to:
i have three-o-six.
paul, it's not too late. don't do this.
shit! ow! he raises his mask and scampers after vitti rubbing the painful bump on his forehead.
you're gonna get in so much trouble. cut to:
how much is that?
really?
well, so much for not peeing in my pants.
you know what you said about not flipping out?
sorry. what did i do? what did i do? i had a perfect life, i threw it away.
i can't help it! my life is over! i'm going to jail. some people can handle prison -- i'm not one of them. i have delicate features. i'm small. i'll be way too popular!
i can't calm down! i'm gonna die! inside the structure, vitti spins him around and shakes him.
i can't breathe! i'm suffocating!
i can't! i'm dying! we're all going to die! suddenly, he slaps vitti hard across the face. they both freeze.
did i just hit you?
i'm sorry, paul. i blame myself for this. i wanted to help you. i wanted to be there for you. but i just wasn't good enough.
no, it is. since my father died -- i've lost my way. i don't know anything anymore. i mean, what's the point? i didn't think it would hit me so hard --
i'm grieving, goddammit! have a little respect!
i'm grieving for myself, you fucking idiot! ben lets it all go, sobbing for all the years of pain.
now i know how you must have felt when your father was killed. vitti looks at him.
i mean, it had to be ten times worse for you -- being murdered right in front of you. and you were so young -
it must've been so painful!
i mean, it's like all his hopes for you died with him. and that's so sad.
your father really loved you.
i know. i know. jelly comes around the corner and sees the two men in a weepy embrace.
rigazzi? i thought he worked for patti lopresti.
i can't take it anymore! that's what i hate about you fucking sociopaths! you just keep changing the rules to suit yourselves. well, not this time, you anti-social asshole. you fucked with the wrong shrink! sitting on eddie's chest, he presses the gun against eddie's nose.
don't you read the papers? the guy
that's it. we're screwed. the cops walk toward the back and confront ben.
yes, officer?
feeling pretty good, huh?
so what now? you go on the run for the rest of your life? back to sing sing? or you turn up dead in an alley?
five minutes? and then what?
did you see patti?
did she grab your balls?
well, i talked to the u.s. attorney.
no, paul, he did not grab my balls. he thanked me for tipping him off about the gold. and he said he won't be coming after you if you stay out of trouble. so what do you think?
good idea. change is hard, paul. but you did the right thing.
well, i just --
i just vented my displaced aggression
i'm not a beast. i can handle myself if i have to --
well, i wrestled a bit in high school -- 122 pounds.
i'm not --
fine. i have a gift.
well, i think so. don't you feel better now?
you're grieving -- it's a process.
you, too, paul. they embrace. then vitti starts to walk away toward jelly who has been waiting at a respectful distance. vitti stops and turns.
'a time and place for us -- '