what the fuck, trip? that's my bass!
shit! it's jam's mom!
i had a nightmare once that something like this might happen. i hope he doesn't get grounded again. if he misses peter criss's drum solo, i don't know if he'll be able to handle it.
poor, jam, man. imagine having to stash your kiss records inside carly simon album covers. no question, mrs. bruce is a psycho-bitch from hell.
trip, a female gynecologist does not a lesbian make. and even if it did, at least my mom didn't give birth to me while she was on lsd.
trip, you fuckin' asshole.
you spilled my sea monkeys all over the bed.
stellas. i hate stellas almost as much as i hate dogs.
yeah, right. she wishes. look at that big ass.
shit, that dork is jam.
yeah, she gives you shit and you take it.
if your mom so much as smells those tickets, they're history, and we get screwed outta seeing kiss for the third year in a row, the third year!
i knew it! i knew this was gonna happen! i had a bad feeling since last night. remember? we are so totally fucked!
wanna bet.
check!
hey, take it easy, man. this is the girls' crapper, remember?
trip, it's not the end of the world, okay? quit acting all squeezed out.
smug, trip! not snug, smug.
i've been in love with her since the second grade.
i have never heard a girl squeeze cheese in my entire life.
heh-heh, sorry.
too bad we're stuck in electronics or.
we won?!
the chinese have a proverb: "that which appears too good to be true, usually is." there's gotta be a catch.
but.  but, st. bernard's is way the hell over in the next county!
we are not stealing my mom's car.
hawk, all i need is one ding on the volvo and presto! there are my balls hanging from the rearview mirror after she gets back from cincinnati.
sunday, but.
simple-icity is more like it. and you guys thought jam was in trouble before. wait till mrs. bruce finds out he went to that concert with us.
the hypothetical temperature characterized by the absence of heat and even the slightest amount of molecular activity? yeah, i'm vaguely familiar
very funny, hawk. okay, i'm in on this hare-brained scheme, but if anything happens to my mom's car, i'm blaming you. i'll say you drugged me or something.
wait a minute. we ditching the rest of school?
hello summer detention.
huh. st. bernard's. figures it's named after a canine.
now, how are we gonna do this?
not looking like that, mr. rogers.
we got you a change of duds when we picked up the car.
my mom's hubcap!
jeezis, hawk, can you at least keep it within twenty miles of the speed limit?
trip, huck that out before it stains the upholstery!
holy shit! we just pissed off the incredible hulk, his idiot half brother and two circus clowns.
the paint!
not so fast, stella.
oh, thanks for letting us draw from your ample make-up supply. you must have the entire revlon factory in your purse!
what is it with you, jam? you got a thing for that.  thing?
your clothes may say disco, but your eyes say rock 'n' roll, baby.
that last remark fell about 30 yards away from making any sense whatsoever.
man, that weed knocked christine on her ass. she's sleeping like a baby stella.
curly driving, hawk. we still got two hours to spare.
really, trip, can we bore holes in your head and use it as a bong so it actually does us some good for a change?
yeah, it's like you're possessed by the flying nun, or something.
uh.  dudes?
dudes!
where's the volvo?
i can see that, bright boy. what happened to it?
but we took the keys?
okay, i'm just a little mad now! jam, why'd you talk us into picking that bitch up in the first place!?
here's a suggestion. let's stop worrying about the concert for the time being and get the cops in on this volvo situation.
i mean, my mom's got insurance. what's the worst thing she could do? ground me for the entire year? i can handle that.
holy shit! i am in absolute trouble! i never should have let you drive, man! absolute fuckin' trouble!
all i got is five. the rest is in the volvo.
i think we should try sneaking in.
okay, one of us sneaks in, gets four ticket stubs off some kids in the audience, comes back out, and we all "re-enter" the concerto. voila!
i can't believe i'm actually entertaining the notion of sneaking in. i oughta have my cranium examined.
whoa. danger will robinson.
shit!
keep it together, lex. anything worth fighting for is worth dying for.
whooooaaa!
this is real. this is not a dream! this is real! i've pierced the inner circle!
oh, god, they're in there!
dogs! why did it have to be dogs!
wake up, lex! wake up, man! this part's gotta be a nightmare!
god, if you ever get me outta this, i swear i will never masturbate again!
i really mean it this time!
okay, okay, you're pissed off. i can see this. so.  maybe what we need.  ah-ha.
play some frisbee, poochies?
alright! i give up! i hearby and forthwith defer my destiny to you mutts. i may be an intelligent, upright, walking, homo-fucking sapien, but you fleabags are a force of nature. so, i'm just gonna sit here and wait for you to decide. if you let me live, i thank you. if you bite my head off, i'll die knowing i did all i could. it's up to you.
well, how do you like that?
whoa! whoa!
you sonsofbitches could tickle a guy to death, y'know that? sure you do.  sure you do.
i'm here for the girl and the car. you can try to stop me, but i must warn you, it may be hazardous to your health.
listen to them. children of the night. what music they make.  hounds of hell? say hello to dinner!
one foot out of that office and your asses are alpo!
aaaayyyyy!
you got a phone in there?
call the cops.
this oughta be enough to get you to disco inferno, christine.
no can do. but i made a promise to get you to that disco, and we kiss maniacs are men of our word. besides.  you're pretty cool.  for a stella, i mean.
i found the volvo.
no.  you don't think?
come on, elvis. we was only kiddin'. it's all in good fun. we run, you chase. cat and mouse. you know.