just one more day of school to get through, girls, before tomorrow night.  live! cobo hall! detroit, michigan! you wanted the best!
jam has yet to do an overnight with us.
you're one to talk, lex. your mom's a fuckin' dyke.
shrooms! and even if it was lsd, i can still give my mom a kiss without smelling the catch of the day.
what?
school. what a fuckin' waste of time.
same species when you think about it.
you know what they say about a big ass.  big shit.
hey, that dork looks just like jam.
so, jam, who did your wardrobe, tad the preppie sailboat captain?
that's some sick shit right there. did she comb your ass hair for you too?
holy shit, my jacket!
waitaminit, dudes! i got it! maybe we can glue the tickets back together!
yeah.
fuck! shit!
wake up, lex! we just watched jam's mom torch our fuckin' kiss tickets! not reo speedwagon! not journey! not the bay city rollers! kiss! if you can think of a better reason to trash a bathroom, i'd sure like to hear it!
oh, everything's hunky-dory now that the shit hit the fan just like you said it would, you snug sonofabitch! you fuckin' jinxed us!
peeeyeewww! that stinks!
wonder if you could smoke shit out of this?
but i gotta take a piss like you would not believe, mr. johansen!
but ever since my doctor put me on salt pills, it's been like niagara falls every half hour! please, mr. j! have mercy!
jeezis, i'm taking a leak in my pants!
i need to be connected to the w.a.r.p. contest hotline.  now.  lady!.  hello, is this me? i'm trip.
i did it! i did it! we won!
this is the best thing that ever happened to me at school! not only are we on again for kiss in detroit, but we're actually sitting right at the fifty yard line! i dare you dudes to find a curlier scenario.
yeah? i have a saying too, lex. it goes, "catch my jizz in your mouth and stop jinxing us, asshole." we're going this time and that's all there is to it.
namely?
simplicity, hawk.
just for the record, i understood the last part of what you said, but for a while there you guys were making no fucking sense whatsoever.
about fuckin' time if you ask me. i'm just going through the motions till i drop out anyway.
well, here we are back at fucking school again.
mmm, pizza.
usually takes anywhere from ten minutes to half an hour.
he's lit.
i'm starvin' and it's way past lunchtime.
let's stop in sandusky, hawk.
pizza, and i been jones-in' for a pizza ever since we left st. bernard's.
eyowch! this is one hot pizza!
that's no girl. that's a stella.
unless there was gonna be a scene where the disco bunny blows the four dudes on the way to the show.
what's it worth to you?
so, are you, like, gonna polish our nobs, or what?
oh, quit bein' the wussy, sensitive guy to impress her, jam. she's obviously not gonna put out. she's a fuckin' tease.
you got in the car, didn't you?
whatever.  stella.
disco blows dogs for quarters.
let's lift up her shirt.
oh, i'll remember it till the day i die. his name was.  simpleton the simian? no, samson samoan.  no, simply, similar.
fuck you, lex! this whole thing wouldn't have happened if it wasn't for you jinxing us. i just made an honest mistake.
really, jam, you tryin' to make us barf?
it's gone.
damn, she musta hot wired it. we picked up a professional car thief in the shape of olivia newton-john!
twenty-five more'n i got.
waitaminit, dudes! i got it! we find four really small kids, beat the shit outta them and steal their tickets. what do you think?
one more time in english.
no thanks, dude. i'm beating my ticket out of some poor, defenseless chump.
hey, you little twerps, gimme your kiss tickets or i'll pop your fuckin' faces in.
i oughta kick your asses for sayin' that.
but i'm in a hurry so i'll just take this instead. now scram.
hey, little kid.
okay, booger, your kiss ticket or your life.
hunh?
oh. okay.  but scream and you'll never live to see puberty. i'll pop your fuckin' face in.
a likely story. hand it over, kid.
hey, kid, that's okay. i don't wanna see kiss that ba.
what do you want?
look, you can have my wallet.
me? mug? that's nuts. i said, do you know where i can take a piss.
please, sir, don't kick my ass! i'll do anything to get out of a beating!
two hundred bucks?
look, i want to live, but i don't know where the fuck i'm gonna find two hundred bucks.
hold on! i know how i can get the money! i just figured it out! only you might wanna wait outside.
alright, everybody, shut up!
okay, bro. you gonna have to do this sometime. might as well be now.
alright, drop it or i'll kick your ass!
the kiss army!
no, you gimme your gun, boy!
not if i shoot first!
neither do i!
smile, you sonofa.
call me.  dr. love!
hundred forty, hundred fifty. that's all i got.
oh, no.  please, look. i.
at least i still got you, stretch.
plenty, but it was all bad.
hey, wait a minute! this ain't school property! he's not the boss of us here!
it was those assholes! they even stole my wallet!
inside that you'll find my kiss army picture i.d. and a hundred fifty bucks cash.
tsk. tsk. tsk. i was really hoping things would work out for you, my weasly, midget friend. you got spunk.