greetings, my friend. you are interested in the unknown, the mysterious, the unexplainable.  that is why you are here. so now, for the first time, we are bringing you the full story of what happened.  we are giving you all the evidence, based only on the secret testimony of the miserable souls who survived this terrifying ordeal. the incidents, the places, my friend, we cannot keep this a secret any longer. can your hearts stand the shocking facts of the true story of edward d. wood, junior??
in 1960, the automobile will have retractable wings, so it can fly.
by 1970, man will have colonized mars. millions of people will live there.
mr. lugosi! it is an unparalleled privilege to meet you. allow me to introduce myself.  i am criswell!
ah, cheer up! don't lose heart over what happened tonight. i predict that your next project will be an outstanding success!
and who may you be?
ah. the director of "glen or glenda."
i'm criswell. i know all.
bring me two more beefeater martinis. eddie will have another whiskey, dagmar's a rum-and-coke, moustapha and king are chablis -- hey bela, would you like a wine?
i guessed.
i made it up. it's horseshit!
there's no such thing as a psychic. people believe my folderol because i wear a turban and a black tuxedo.
eddie, we're in show biz! it's all about razzle-dazzle. appearances. if you dress nice and talk well, people will swallow anything.
i predict "bride of the atom" will be the biggest moneymaker of all time!
bravo! bravo! magnifico!
my pleasure. i'm always happy to assist in a little larceny.
you know how much this car cost me?
one dollar! miss mae west herself sold it to me. she said, cris, you belong in a pink cadillac!
incidentally, you promise you're not going to scratch my car?
hey, keep it down. my publicist will throttle me if we get caught.
oh my god. we killed him.
thank god tor broke the fence.
so you sleep in coffins?!
i can't believe this! i sleep in coffins!
yes! my father ran a mortuary -- it's an old habit!
so who's the surprise for?
isn't that like him! and isn't that like us -- that we show up anyway.
excuse me. we're here for the wood party.
i predict it's dolores in a mask.
edward, are you sure you know what you're doing?
i predict we're lost.
it's show biz.
ah! now i see it.
why couldn't we do this in the church?
i don't think he's coming up!
"perhaps on your way home, someone will pass you in the dark, and you will never know it. for they will be from outer space."
you are about to see en extraordinary motion picture. but before it begins, i think we ought to give a hand to the man without whom we wouldn't be here tonight.  eddie, take a bow!
my friend, you have just seen the story of edward d. wood, junior. stranger than fact.  and yet every incident based on sworn testimony. a man. a life. can you prove it didn't happen?