the man i was supposed to have a meeting with had a heart attack, if you can believe that. so i decided to try and sneak home for a few days before my next set of meetings. george appears behind laura, not knowing what he's getting himself into.
hello.
it is really nice to meet you, george. laura talks about you all the time, and we're obviously big fans of your movies.
people never thought china would do this much business with us, you know, but it didn't seem like a risky proposition for me. they've got a billion people, we make all kinds of cool shit in america, they start finding out about it on the internet and what-not. sooner or later they're gonna find a way to get our shit.
you don't think they want new mobile phones? a new x-box? i'm trying to get access into north korea, no shit. that situation could chance overnight. that is a huge market waiting to be tapped. it's already starting in cuba.
so, george. how are you holding up?
how are you feeling?
it's a terrible situation. i'm so sorry.
you're a tougher man than me. i don't know how i could go about my day with that hanging over my head.
do you know who might be able to help you? a chinese doctor. have you explored eastern medicine at all?
i'm trying to help the man.
hey. i'm the last guy who would buy into that shit, but it works.
our country's only two hundred years old. the chinese have been around for thousand of years figuring this shit out. how i got into it, i had acid ref lux and nothing was working and then this guy at work turned me onto a chinese doctor and he gave me some herbs that tasted like dogshit, but they worked.
you girls can go play in the other room. the chinese have a completely different way of looking at health. they don't think doctors should attack the diseases in the body, they're all about trying to support the body and make it stronger, so the body can fight off the disease. it works. i've seen it. i wish i could find a way to mass-market chinese medicine in this country. someone's gonna do it and make a fuck-load of money. because these people get old, really old. you can't kill these people.
this guy's funny. you should be opening up for this guy. hey, who wants a drink?
i'm going to retire in seven years. i'm done. i'm playing golf for the next fifty years. work hard now, then get out. that's my plan. i'm putting in the time. then i'm getting the fuck out. i don't like working. i will do it. i like what it gets me. but i don't like it.
that's what i hear. can't say i watched that much 'melrose place' back in the day. she keeps telling me to watch the videos but, you know, i was never a big 'party of five' fan.
okay, if you say so. the mask was a funny fucking movie. you know what other movie cameron diaz was great in? 'there's something about mary.' laura looks livid at her husband's insensitivity and disrespect. they keep walking.
i love walking it off after a big meal.
you can't leave now, you won't get back until daylight. you should crash in the guest house. i'm sure it not as fancy pants as where you live, george, but it's better than driving all night or crashing at a hotel.
and if you want to hang out tomorrow i just installed six flatscreens, we can watch all the football games we want. and dog- racing from florida. there's a big game tomorrow. ira, you must have played some ball in your day.
you sure you can't stay?
i wish i could say i was gonna see you again, but i can't say that. his eyes start to mist up.
you know what? i think i do need to do that. one thing i learned in china from some buddhist friends of mine is it's important to have an open heart, to live in the moment, and to speak the truth to each other. so i'd like to say to you, george, that it was a great pleasure to meet someone who had such a big impact on my wife's life. i really like you. and wish we had more time to get to know each other. and i wish you a peaceful end to your journey. and another great journey on the other side of it. clarke hugs george.
mable, take ingrid into the house.
yes. go into the house and watch a movie now! mable and ingrid walk back to the house.
what the fuck is going on around here? is that true?
is it looking better? or is he better? is he sick anymore?
is something going on here? are you getting your revenge on me while i'm away? i came clean with you, you can't come clean with me.
so this is what you want? was he ever sick in the first place?
because if this is what you want, i'll leave right now. i'm not going to play these games. i'm happy to leave. i'm not gonnna have you put me on the cross because i made some mistakes. you guys enjoy each other. i could give a fuck. if you need me, i'll be at my apartment in china. clarke leaves.
then i have to make a change. i'll stop most of the traveling. there's nothing more important than you and the kids. ira starts to turn to sneak away. clarke sees him.
ira! what's going on? what are you doing here?
you're headed back to los angeles? then why are you at the international terminal?
yeah, this is the air china first class lounge. reveal that everyone else in the lounge is chinese.
what the fuck is going on? what the fuck is going on, laura?
tel- me the truth ! just tell me the tri.t_h.;_
who's watching the kids? who's watching the fucking kids?
is george watching our fucking kids? i will kill him. clarke runs off.
(angry-to mable and
ye s.
no one who's married is fucking happy. leave us alone! you fucked up. you fucked it up with her a long time ago. let it go or i will kill you. i will literally kill you till you're fucking dead. that disease didn't kill you. but i will kill you.
don't pretend you're fucking mad at each other, just to distract me so i won't beat your ass. clarke pushes george.
you're gonna come to my house? you're gonna come to my fucking house? you have to get your own life. leave us the fuck alone.
don't tell me what i can and can not do.
hit the road before i put you through another round.
yeah, but we're married. we're going to work through this shit. you should have waited until you were married to cheat. it buys you another chance. clarke punches george. ira is on the ground. he doesn't get up.
when she said that, did she think you were dying?
too bad you had to 'live and find out it wasn't true. leave my fucking family alone! clarke punches him. george gets a punch in but it doesn't hurt clarke. clarke punches him again.
i can do this all night.
come on girls. let's go inside. mable and ingrid run inside. clarke turns to george.
you know what sucks about this? i like your movies and now i can't watch them anymore. clarke walks away, then walks back.
i'm sorry. that was mean. through ail of this, i want you to know something. i'm glad that you're not sick, and i understand. and i forgive you. clarke goes inside.
	52:
i try not to take them too often. just when i know i have to get up early.
so you whacked off three times last night? don't worry, i'll get you some money. is five hundred good?
yeah, that sounds like a.  nice idea.
hey, you were funny tonight. i could see how you could get good.
you're still crying.
you need to shut the fuck up right now. have you been browsing the self-help section at barnes and noble? is this what you say in between songs these days? i'm going to go right now and delete all your songs off my ipod.
they said they're gonna start giving me good spots on the weekends.
give me a break. i don't even know you.
i don't.
email back and say: if you can, bring that hot chick from your last movie. we definitely have room for her.
well, then maybe just bring grain alcohol then. they all start laughing. the computer bings again.
i know it's not that funny, but they do slip in some funny shit in there every now and again.
so, are you guys dating now?
great.
i thought everyone came to see me. george begins his act. he could not kill harder. or look more healthy and charismatic. we can tell it is all a show for laura. laura is completely thrown by this turn of events. the content of george's act is meant to portray him in a more positive, sympathetic light to laura. he talks about being sick and the lessons he learned in a very dark, hilarious, and also uplifting way. all of it is intended to make him look like he has grown up and become wiser, and someone you could trust and spend your life with.
you've got the best of both worlds. rock it out take it slow. and then you rock out the show! everyone applauds for her.
you were good.
i want to go down like london, london.
take me down to the paradise city. where the grass is green and the girls are pretty. oh, won't you please take me home.
just an urchin livin' under the street, i'm a hard case that's tough to beat. i'm your charity case so buy me somethin' to eat. i'll pay you at another time! take it to the end of the line!
always. that woman hates me. and i hate her. and now our kids really like each other, so it's really fucked up.
when is george gonna die?
this is really great pizza. thank you very much.
i take herbs for my pms. they really helped.
yeah, we're free. they start kissing again. she starts to moan loudly.
jesus christ, what time is it already?
okay.
you were good the other night. i hear you're getting regular spots now.