tell him to fuck himself. nicely. cancel. cancel the whole afternoon. do it. did he leave a number? that's all, maria. i haven't seen the menu. an iced tea, please-- thanks, "pee-pee." i never get tired of that. well. long time. business as usual. a little girl. it's not mine, she married a pediatrician in sausalito. she stopped drinking, i guess getting rid of me was the 13th step. i redecorated. where have you been? i called them off two years ago, david. you'd kicked the heroin, you'd left the ashram, you were windsurfing somewhere in central america. look, are you in trouble, is there anything you need? you can't have gone through the trust fund. you didn't bake me a cake, did you? what is this. consumer recreation services. ok. i don't get it. is this an escort service? fun. just a cheesebur. how'd you find this place? you know, david, this is sweet, but it's an awfully busy time, i'm in the midst of a delicate liquidation-- david-- what are you talking about? are you still on medication? ok, ok, i'll give them a call. look, take a pill. just be normal for thirty seconds and tell me what this is. i hate surprises. van orton. eleven forty, you almost didn't make it. oh, the usual, big party, circus clowns, naked lady in a cake. i'm just fine. how are you? hm? just another birthday, another year closer to death. oh that's right, i guess he was 38, wasn't he? i hadn't thought about it, to tell the truth, but thank you for the reminder. i honestly don't know, but it's a nice change of pace from talking to your attorneys. so, still working at the hospice? great, that's great. well, give my regards to dr. mel and the baby-- really. congratulations-- two kids, an official nuclear family, you must be very happy. well, you deserved someone who wanted the same things you did-- speaking of little brothers, i saw david today. he asked about you. he's on a new kick, some personal improvement cult. i'm gonna check it out, i'm sure he's getting fleeced again. right. well, thanks again for calling, elizabeth, take care. mm, good luck, bye. i'll drink to that. is this consumer recreation services? i have an appointment, the name's van orton. schuyler van orton, i called last week. i know what you mean. look-- what is all this? let's back up here-- not at all. what are you selling? a game. this really doesn't sound like my sort of-- what's so amusing? so. the type. i'm not a player. what kind of fu-- game is this? i'm not an idiot. i see what you're doing. first the vague yet intriguing pitch, then i'm supposed to feel like my manhood's in question because i'm not up for, what, some motivational role-playing fantasy nonsense-- please, jim, cut the hard-to-get shit. i've got the afternoon free, i'll take your silly tests. david, you suck. this was actually a gift. did my brother pay in advance? you mean dissatisfied. i get that all the time. so i'm supposed to sign up for a game when i don't know the rules, i don't know the object, i don't know how much it costs. when can i expect to hear-- david, where the hell are you, we were supposed to meet at the club-- i'll be in seattle. i checked out crs by the way-- haven't decided yet. new members? this round's on me. great thing about golf, the way it takes you out of your life. speaking of games-- i take it you two are familiar with crs? i couldn't help overhearing-- i only bring it up because, well, i recently tested for it. i just wasn't sure if they're for real, whether it's worth it-- sorry? no is not an option. if you fail to recognize that, i'll find ten other law firms in the yellow pages that can get the job done-- yes. yes, who is this? what?! how did you get this number? i'm in a meeting-- --so i don't have time for-- excuse me, what was that? why? this is absurd-- no, nothing. sorry, bob. so were there any more questions, or may i assume it's under control. hello! what are you doing here? wonderful. you ok? you dead? shit, shit, shit. fuckers! yeah, this is pretty impressive but listen-- my name is schuyler van orton, my game just started. look, this is a bad time, i'm about to leave town-- i'm expecting a package with some documents. did it arrive? no thank you. i'll take my chances. alan! what's wrong with a car-- fine. bg lumber is not profitable and hasn't been for years, my duty is to salvage what i can. these are the closing papers, in ten minutes i'm going to present the sale terms to the shareholders and elect my new management team. what game? never mind. we'll just have to go with the earlier draft. where are they. up my ass, very funny. i don't-- ok. ok, you're with crs. so the game, it's just a screen, to blow this deal. like hell you aren't. how did you get my brother involved, that's unforgivable. everything seems to be in order. please disregard my last comments. the shareholders meeting is about to get underway. shall we? listen, i quit. no, cretin. i'm quitting the game. i said i-- shit! where is it? i realize you're just some bit player, but i'd like you to get a message to your employers. this bullshit is interfering with my work, it's breaking my concentration and i can't allow that to happen-- if i take that stupid key, will you give me back my briefcase and go away? what the fuck am i doing?! i told you, this is over! i quit! i was supposed to meet someone here, a david van orton-- i was wondering if he'd left a message. oh this is cute. very cute. no it wasn't. what's next, a giant banana peel? drop the act, you've been waiting all day for this moment. let's get this over with. where's the next key? does she have it? i wish you people could be a little more subtle. don't you have something for me? wait, you really work here-- slow down-- you don't understand, i thought it was a gag. i was only trying to apologize. fine. this is just too weird-- it can't be real-- i don't give it out-- is there anything i can do? no! i have work to do-- wait a minute, you've got my phone-- i don't want to be here. i'd like my phone back please. oh, this day keeps getting better. as a matter of fact. it's a little hard to explain. i seem to be playing a game. this is supposed to be funny-- --a challenge, a puzzle. damn it, no signal. i wouldn't-- i don't know the rules, if there are any, but it seems the obvious move usually backfires. i think i have a key. damn it. wrong key. i can see now. grab my arm. stay on the path! christine, don't move! where are the glasses?! we can't get out of here without them! they're rubber. hold onto me, i'll get us out of here. fine, stay. what's your favorite color? sorry, it's my game. but we'll take blue. sky van orton. far from it. nice to meet you. it's a company called consumer recreation services, crs. i never know what's gonna happen next. until recently, i had a pretty good idea. duck. i'm sorry, you shouldn't have been dragged into this. ah. wait, so the heart attack, you knew that was a joke too-- but that cpr routine-- we're getting somewhere. mm, a different kind of fun. what's your middle name? you're supposed to be here. they picked you for a reason. probably knew you'd play good samaritan for that guy, drag me along-- but they could have hired an actor for that, less of a risk. maybe you can't play alone-- there's something in here i need. i imagine i'll find out. this is their offices. we must have been in their garage. my office is just a few blocks from here, we can get cleaned up there. find everything you need? my apologies, i'll have it taken care of. help yourself to the fridge. rich enough. bit forward, aren't you? manage investments, some venture capital, i'm on the board of a number of publicly traded companies. basically. beats working, huh? look, i hope you haven't been too put out. i could probably get you another job, i have a stake in a couple of restaurants-- can you type? mm. so where do you live? what do you mean? of course. we'd better head downstairs, the limo's waiting. yes. up here on the left. i'm not playing anymore. i have a life. jack'll take you home, or wherever you want to go. forget it. no, it's not-- just-- back from the cleaners. good night. jesus, david, you scared the shit out of me-- where were you today? slow down, take a breath-- what are you talking about? calm down. what are they doing to you? look. that's crazy. yes, it's a pain in the ass, but why would they keep playing once you paid them? it was on my windshield-- david, get a grip, it's just a flat tire! damn it, the phone's not working-- fine, i'll change the fucking thing myself. no, you can't do it from-- what the fuck are those-- um, david-- hello? they planted those keys! i don't know what the hell they're for-- what?! what friends? get a grip, david-- why would i do that? for what?! i can't! listen to me-- six three six mission, please. you're heading the wrong way. why are you doing this-- what the fuck is this-- thank you. i'm very grateful. i have to get in touch with the police. uh, no. i'm fine. these fit. . perfectly. i am finished playing. this has got to fucking stop! who are you!? who hired you. the service? a key. i'm supposed to carry a fucking hatchet around? relax. i don't want it. let's go. seventh floor. it's not his fault, he's unstable, he didn't know what he was doing-- he likes chinese food. whatever. oh, god-- no no no-- you people are insane. how did you do this, how did you get in here? look, at least leave my brother alone, he's fragile enough as it is-- you can't just fuck with people like this, you don't know who you're dealing with! what the fuck do you want from me?! son of a bitch. that isn't mine. i've never been here before in my life! jack. the woman you took home the other night, where did you go? i know, what was the address? what? shit. shit! it wasn't me, jack. jack, i'm serious. it wasn't me. a friend's dog-- he'd been hit by a car, i drove him to the vet. golden retriever, beautiful animal. too early to say. mr. kaminsky? schuyler van orton-- you have a daughter named christine? i'm afraid she might be in danger. last night, when jack dropped you off-- did anything happen? i thought-- eh, you don't wanna know. i thought they kidnapped you, tortured you-- crs. i saw pictures, girl with a tattoo on her shoulder like yours-- no, i thought they were trying to frame me, they planted evidence. i have no idea, nothing they do makes any sense. forget it, it's just a game. i was worried about you. i wanted to see you again. sure, why not. is that you? don't touch me. god damn it. fuck you. ok, that's it, game over-- --you can come out now, assholes-- no, enough already. i've had it. now what. oh, now i suppose they're going to-- holy shit!! what is this!? get out of my car. get in. you can talk while i drive to the police station. spare me the snide comments. and please don't do that in here-- wait, how did-- before the game, you were working in that bar-- oh god, david's in on it? how the hell did they think they were gonna get my money? it might be best if you didn't speak. i very nearly crushed your skull just now. just under a billion dollars. do i look like i'm kidding? this is about more than my personal lifestyle-- your pals raided pension plans, charitable foundations, company payrolls. i don't know what kind of jerk-off con games you've played in the past, but now you're in the big leagues, hon. you just helped sabotage a small portion of the national economy-- and destroy a whole lotta lives. you're not having any? hold still. sorry, this place hasn't been cleaned in a while. my dad built it himself, spent a lot of time here alone. rotten carpenter. just-- private joke. well. i always told myself i wasn't gonna end up like him. and now here i am, running his corporation, living in his house, hiding in the cabin where he went to hide right before he. i even look like the bastard. mm, plus i'm a helluva lot more gullible than he ever was. yes. my, lawyer. so. what's our next move? wait-- that's not true-- oh, god. what are they paying you, robert? piece of the action? we have to get out of here! well, that was stupid. ok, they've gotten to him. ok. is there anyone i can trust? what do you mean? christine!! why. what? where am i?! please, help me, i'm an american! i'm lost! please!! hello. where am i? that's gibberish! right. my father's dead, god damn it. i have to get to the united states embassy. i don't know. a week?! christ knows what they can do in a week-- and what the hell am i supposed to, to live on?! what day is it anyway? where's the nearest pawn shop? yeah, well i, i seem to have lost my passport. huh, close enough. no. fuck you. i'm going to live. david. what are you doing here? thank god. listen, i know you put them onto me-- but i understand, we're both victims of this thing. they've stolen everything we ever had, they're trying to drive us both crazy-- but we won't let them. we'll find a way. there's gotta be a way to beat these bastards! we're in it together. the game. no, david-- please. she isn't really a waitress. nothing. are the tattoos supposed to mean something? ok, there's the c. come on, you're not going to put me through all this shit and then kill me on a fucking train, it won't look like a suicide. what do you think you're doing, this guy attacked me! hello elizabeth. i'm sorry, i shouldn't be bothering you-- you're a genuinely good person, your work is important, it's real, nothing that happens to me is real anymore-- i need your help, you're the only one left, the only one i can trust-- not that i deserve your help, god how could you have even married me, i was a shit to you-- yes i was. sometimes i think i'm being punished for my sins, i mean, there has to be a reason. this is one of their devices, i pulled it off their assassin in the subway. it's how they communicate with each other. i can't find the right channel. listen, i may not make it through this-- if anything happens, get that notebook to, to, the press, or the fbi or something. someone you can trust, i don't know, assuming you can trust anyone. i just want you to know i'm not crazy, and i didn't kill myself, no matter what they say-- has this been opened? i don't think coffee is safe. before what? crisis people. crisis people? you bastard! you fucking bastard! how did you find me here!? fuck you! who are you? he's an actor. he's just a fucking actor. what? elizabeth, please. i'm sorry, i'ii be alright, it's just been a hard day. listen, i gotta use the restroom, be right back-- he's an actor, does tv commercials, i know he's ordered from you, he had food delivered to an office building on mission-- damn it! isn't there any way we can get in touch with him now? i see. bill fisher, hi! i really admire your work. get rid of them. i've seen your resume. i'm sick of foot soldiers, i've gotta get to whoever's in charge. how do i find them!? their offices were abandoned-- ok. they know you, you've worked for them. you're going to get me inside. tell them anything, tell them the cops are after you, you've gotta talk to someone or you'll blow the whistle. you don't seem to understand. right here, right now-- i'm the danger. drive in, then. really-- i don't know. improvise. go! i'm back from the dead. i don't give a fuck about the money, i wanna know who's behind this, who did this to me, how, why-- you're not going anywhere. feingold, or or fisher, was that just a game too? i watched him die. seemed like a nice guy, actually, father of three-- you taste it, you fucking vampire. back off. everybody back off. shit, how do we get out-- it's my gun. a gun store. guess you fucked up again. yeah, it's real all right. stop it. every word out of your mouth is a lie-- of course you did. so you could kill me or, or frame me for murder-- i open the door and i die. you move again i swear i'll kill you, you bitch. they? we? shut up, shut the fuck up!! you just said you wanted me to come here-- you're making this up as you go along! stop. fucking. with my head! david, david, no, no-- you're not gonna die. i'm here, you're not gonna die. fun. i think so. you? what's your name? nice to meet you, susan. look, i have to know. who's really in charge? i know, liz, i've been an idiot, and i'm sorry. yeah-- i'm good, really. happy to be alive. listen, it's great to see all of you, thanks for coming-- but there's something i have to do. excuse me. what game? is it always like this? i thought it was a gift. what? where are we going?