harry? did someone say harry?
`course not. think i'd know if my best friend was in my room, wouldn't i?
you've a bit of.
mum sort of lost it last week. said ginny and i had no business going back to hogwarts. that it's too dangerous.
anyway, dad stepped in, told her she was being barmy. took a day or two, but she came round.
a hundred and fifty. give or take a few years.
how much for this?
how much for me?
but i'm your brother!
c'mon. let's go.
hi.
fred reckons people need a laugh these days.
is it just me? or do draco and mummy look like two people who don't want to be followed?
what're they playing at?
hey. where's hermione?
harry, where is she?
sorry.
one of what?
you're barking. what would you- know-who want with a sod like malfoy?
it's a creepy shop. he's a creepy bloke.
probably on the platform. c'mon.
don' you worry. he'll be `long soon `nuff --
oi! turn around, you lunatic.
looks like his own this time.
sorting hat urged us all to be brave and strong in these troubled times -- easy for it to say -- it's a hat, isn't it? first years seemed to enjoy it, though. wankers. filch give you the wand outside?
that was cheerful.
but i don't want to take potions!
ron weasley, sir. but i'm dead awful at potions, a menace actually, so i probably should just be going --
hard feelings?
really? strapping guy like you, you've got a beater's build, don't you think? keeper needs to be agile, quick --
have to admit, thought i was going to miss that last one. hope cormac's not taking it too hard.
has a bit of a thing for you, hermione. cormac.
not bloody likely. he's top of the class. even better than you, hermione. slughorn thinks he's a genius.
what?
yeah. right. well, it's true. i like a nice chat before i go to bed. now you're always reading that bloody book. it's like being with hermione.
spider? about six feet tall? ten feet wide?
barking. does he not remember that raving arachnid tried to eat us? what?
o-kay.
aw, bloody hell.
i'd like to leave.
that happens to be my sister.
what're you playing at?
get to know him?
um.  you've got a little.
bit worried about her. did you hear that rubbish she was talking back in the pub? her and me snogging. ha. as if.
harry, she's swallowing her tongue --
believe me, professor, i've been asking myself the same question for six years.
what do you suppose dean sees in her? ginny.
dean? he's brilliant.
yeah, well, he was running his hands all over my sister, wasn't he? something snaps. you've got to hate him. you know, on principle.
so what is it? he sees in her?
attractive?
skin? you're saying dean's dating my sister because of her skin?
hermione's got nice skin. wouldn't you say? as skin goes, i mean.
right.
so. how was it?
your dinner party.
i expect you'll be going with mclaggen. isn't he a member of the slug club?
really?
i'm resigning. after today's match. mclaggen can have my spot.
sure.
c'mon, harry. we've got a game to win.
what's with the birds?
look, i can't help it if she's got her knickers in a twist. what lav and i have -- well, let's just say there was no stopping it. it's chemical. will it last? who knows? point is, i'm a free agent.
unbreakable vow. you're sure that's what snape said.
it's just, well, you can't break an unbreakable vow.
no, you don't understand -- oh, bloody hell.
all she wants to do is snog me. my lips are getting chapped. look.
you die.
lav, c'mon. of course i'll wear it.
it's beautiful, isn't it? the moon.
it was on your bed. the box. thought i'd try one.
i can't stop thinking about her, harry.
she could never annoy me. i think.  i think i love her.
do you think she knows i exist?
snogging? who're you talking about?
romilda, of course. romilda vane.
it's no joke! i'm in love with her!
no. can you introduce me?
how do i look?
where's romilda?
hello, darling. fancy a drink?
what's this?
what happened to me?
i feel really.  bad.
these girls are gonna kill me, harry.
er.  my.  nee.  er! my! nee! ron, in a haze, reaches out blindly. blushing, hermione takes his hand. instantly, he falls unconscious again. lavender, vibrating with rage, stalks out. dumbledore beams.
huh?
tell me again how i broke up with lavender?
don't get me wrong. i'm bloody thrilled to be shot of her. it's just she seems.  a bit put out. as one, the three glance over at lavender and are rewarded with a lethal squint.
well.  there is.  something. but no. it can't be. besides, i was completely boggled, wasn't i?
so. did you and ginny do it? harry jumps, watches ron appear.
you know. hide the book.
still no luck with slughorn, i take it? harry shakes his head -- then stops cold, stares at the empty space where slughorn stood moments before.
no. i got an owl from dad this morning. the one at borgin & burke's? it's still there.
good luck, mate.