hello, my lovelies, i will join you in moments. i'm finishing up a game with my five new friends here.
so who are you?
really? no, i wasn't aware of that at all.
well, yes they did, but it's not really that difficult.
gengus khaun! i would never of gotten that. she walks over, and joins the masquerading germans table, the gentlemen rise. she greets each warmly with a french cheek kiss, as if she knows them well. they all take a seat. the two basterds, and one brit, drink whiskey. the taverns proprietor, a older, big bellyed frenchman named earl, comes over to the table, and pours more champagne into bridget's champagne glass. he leaves, returning back behind the bar, with the young french barmaid, the only other person in the establishment. obviously, they speak german, subtitled into english;
normally that's true. the sgt over there's wife, just had a baby. his commanding officer gave him, and his mates the night off to celebrate.
f no, we should stay. for one drink at least. i've been waiting for you in a bar, it would look strange if we left before we had a drink.
there's been some new developments. the cinema venue has changed.
no one knows. but that in itself shouldn't be a problem. the cinema it's been changed to is considerably smaller then the ritz. so whatever materials you brought for the ritz, should be doubly effective here. now this next piece of information is colossal, try not to over react. the fubrer, will be attending tomorrow. hugo stiglitz does a spit take. bridget's eyes bore holes in him.
you'll be going as ernst schuller. you'll say your a associate producer on riefenstahl's "tiefland". it's the one german production not under goebbels control, and leni wouldn't be caught dead at a goebbels film affair.
the films gone through many delays, and leni's heath is deteriorating, so if you have to speak.  hicox, seeing the german master sgt approach, signals for her to cool it.
i'd love to wilhelm. this handsome happy sgt, just became a father today. the pretend officers offer congratulations to the sgt. the german master sgt, clicks his heels, and bows before his superior officers.
so wilhelm, do you know the name of this progeny yet?
there you go. but wait, i'm not finished yet. she reaches into her clutch, and pulls out some lipstick. applies some ruby red color to her lips, and then kisses the napkin, leaving a big red lip print. then hands the treasured item to the young father.
nothing but the best for little maximilian.
major, if my word means anything, i can vouch for everything the young cap't has just said. he does hail from the bottom of piz palu, he was in the film, and his brother is far more handsome then he. the impostors laugh. then. so does the gestapo major. he turns to the sgt.
by all means, major. the gestapo major sits at the table, opposite lt.hicox, and wicki. the french barmaid brings over the majors beer stein.
the captain is my date, but all three are my guests. we're old friends major, who go back along time. longer then a actress would care to admit. chuckle chuckle.
i'll drink to that.
okay, one game.
no.
don't be ridiculous, obviously he wasn't born in america.
of course not, major.
nor i. i'll stay with bubbly. lt.bicox, hold up three fingers , to eric the owner.
- major -
then major, i implore you. for the sake of those german troops, will you please leave with us?
he was a enemy soldier, who knew who i was. he couldn't live.
few questions about what?
the british officer blew his german act, and a gestapo major saw it.
i can see, since you didn't see what happened inside, the nazi's being there must look odd.
the english man, gave himself away.
he ordered three glasses. she holds up three fingers, index to pinky.
we order, three glasses. she holds up three fingers, thumb to index.
that's the german three. the other is odd. germans would, and did notice it.
tuxedos. to get them into the premiere, wearing military uniforms, with all the military there, would of been suicide. but going as members of the german film industry, they wear tuxedos, and blend in with everybody else. i arranged a tailor to fit three tuxedos tonight.
hand me my purse. they do. and she opens it, and takes out three tickets to the film premiere.
lt.hicox was going as my escort. the other two were going as a german cameraman and his assistant.
can you speak german better then your friends, no. have i been shot, yes. i don't see me tripping the light fantastique up the red carpet any time soon. least of all by tomorrow night.
it probably has something to do with the second development.
the fuhrer's attending the premiere.
the venue change, two weeks ago. the fuhrer's attendance, four days ago.
we need to get something straight, once and for all. everything london knows, it learned from me. if i don't know, london doesn't know. so now, this is me, informing you, hitler's coming to paris.
what are you thinking?
what's that suppose to mean?
i'm going to probably end up losing this leg, bye bye acting career, fun while it lasted. how do you expect me to walk up a red carpet?
i don't. i like smoking, drinking, and ordering in restaurants, but i see your point.
splendid. when the nazi's put me up against a wall, it won't hurt so much. i know this is a silly question before i ask it, but can you american's speak any other language then english?
preferably. donny referring to aldo and himself.
with a atrocious accent, no doubt. but that doesn't exactly kill us in the crib. germans don't have a good ear for italian. so you mumble italian, and brazen through it, is that the plan?
that sounds good.
no, it's good. if you don't blow it, with that, i can get you in the building. so, who does what?
what about the little one?
i didn't mean any offence.
you americans are fucking useless!
but there is a problem. i'm a movie star. this is a movie premiere. i can't show up looking like i was just in a nazi gun fight. now i have a dress for the premiere at my hotel. but sometime tomorrow, i have to get my hair done. all the basterds, except donny, burst out laughing.
colonel landa, it's been years. dashing as ever i see.
save your flattery, you old dog. i know too many of your former conquests, to fall into that honey pot. chuckle-chuckle.
well, i tried my hand, foolishly i might add, at mountain climbing. and this was the result.
believe it or not, yes it is. a brief moment passes between the two.
well, i chant be doing it again, i can tell you that.
very good eye, colonel. it happened yesterday morning.
i'm afraid neither three speak a word of german. their friends of mine from italy. this is a wonderful italian stuntman, antonio margheriti. a very talented cameraman, enzo gorlomi. and enzo's camera assistant, dominick decocco. the german fraulein turns to the three tuxedo wearing basterds.
bonjour.
colonel, you embarrass me.