my name is lt.aldo raine, and i'm puttin together a special team. and i need me eight soldiers. eight - jewish - american - soldiers. now y'all might of heard rumors about the armada happening soon. well, we'll be leavin a little earlier. we're gonna be dropped into france, dressed as civilians. and once we're in enemy territory, as a bushwackin, guerrilla army, we're gonna be doin one thing, and thing only, killin nazi's. the members of the national socialist party, have conquered europe through murder, torture, intimidation, and terror. and that's exactly what we're gonna do to them. now i don't know bout y'all? but i sure as hell, didnt come down from the goddamn smoky mountains, cross five thousand miles of water, fight my way through half sicily, and then jump out of a fuckin air-o-plane, to teach the nazi's lessons in humanity. nazi ain't got no humanity. there the foot soldiers of a jew hatin, mass murderin manic, and they need to be destroyed. that's why any and every son-of-a--bitch we find wearin a nazi uniform, there gonna die.
that's what i like to hear. but i got a word of warning to all would-be warriors. when you join my command, you take on debit. a debit you owe me, personally. every man under my command, owes me, one hundred nazi scalps. and i want my scalps. and all y'all will git me, one hundred nazi scalps, taken from the heads of one hundred dead nazi's.  .or you will die trying.
hey hirschberg, send that kraut sarge over.
lt.aldo raine, pleased to meet cha. you know what sit down means werner?
then sit down.
hows your english werner? cause if need be, we gotta a couple fellas can translate. aldo points at one of the basterds in the circle,
wicki there, a austrian jew, got the fuck outta saltzberg, while the gettin was good. became american, got drafted, and came back to give y'all what for. then aldo points to another basterd. a big scary looking basterd, in a german sgt's uniform, named, sgt.hugo stiglitz
and another one over there, you might be familiar with, sgt.hugo stiglitz. heard of 'em. the two german sgt's look at each other.
sgt.hugo stiglitz? hugo nods.
we just wanna say, we're a big fan of your work. when it comes to killin nazi's, i think you show great talent, and i pride myself on havin a eye for that kind of talent. but your status as a nazi killer, is still amateur. we all came here to see, if you wanna go pro?
now werner, i'm gonna assume you know who we are?
well werner, if you heard of us, you probably heard, we ain't in the prisoner takin business. we in the killin nazi business. and cousin, business is boomin. the basterds laugh.
up the road a piece, there's a orchard. 'sides you, we know there's another kraut patrol fuckin around here somewhere. now if that patrol were to have any crackshots, that orchard, would be a goddamn snipers delight. now if you ever wanna eat a sauerkraut sandwich again, you gotta show me on this map, where they are, you gotta tell me how many they are, and you gotta tell me, what kinda artillery they carrying with 'em?
well, werner that's where your wrong. because that's exactly what i expect. i need to know about germans hidin in trees? and you need to tell me? and you need to tell me, right now? now take your finger, and point out on this map, where this partys bein held, how manys comin, and what they brought to play with? werner site, head held high, back straight, chin up, every inch the german hero facing death.
you see that ole boy battin rocks? we rack focus to a one of the basterds not in the circle. he's wearing a wife beater, and power hitting stones with a baseball bat. werners eyes go to the ballplayer.
that's sgt.donny donowitz. but you might know him better by his nickname, the bear jew. now if you heard of aldo the apache, you gotta heard about the bear jew?
what did you hear?
he bashes their brains in with a baseball bat, what he does.
actually werner, we're all tickled ya said that. frankly, watchin donny beat nazi's,to death, is the closest we ever get to goin to the movies.
got a german here wants to die for country. oblige him.
you wanna live?
point out on this map, the german position. his arm shoots out like a rocket, and points out the positions.
how many?
what kinda of artillery?
now when you report what happened here, you can't tell 'em, you told us, what you told us. they'll shoot ya. but there gonna wanna know, why you so special, we let you live? so tell 'em, we let ya live, so you could spread the word through the ranks, what's gonna happen to every nazi we find.
now say we let ya go, and say you survive the'war? when you get back home, what'eha gonna do?
well, ain't that's a real nice boy. are you going to take off your uniform?
so i'm gonna give ya a little somethin, you can't take off.
you didn't say the goddamn rendez-vous was in a fuckin basement.
you said it was in a tavern?
yeah, in a basement. you know, fightin in a basement offers a lot of difficulties, number one being, your fighting in a basement. wilhelm wicki, joins the shot, dressed in a german s.s. lieutenant uniform.
is that the kinds man you need, the loquacious type?
so y'all git in trouble in there, what are we suppose to do? make bets on how it all comes out?
ya don't got to be stonewall jackson to know you don't want to fight in a basement.
right now, we just need morphine. donny yells at the old man;
now 'fore we yank that slug outta ya, you need to answer a few questions
about i got three men dead back there, and why don't you try tellin us what the fuck happened?
'fore we get into who shot john, why did you invite my men to a rendez-vous in a basement with a bunch of nazis?
yeah, we gotta word for that kinda odd in english, it's called, suspicious.
how did the shootin start?
how did you intend to get them into the premiere?
enormous changes at the last minute? that's not very germatic. why the hell is goebbels doin stuff so damn peculiar?
when the hell did this happen?
i'm thinking getting a wack at plantin ole uncle adolph makes this a horse of a different color.
it means, your gettin us in that premiere.
the doggie docs gonna dig that slug outta your gam. then he's gonna wrap it up in a cast, and you gotta good how i broke my leg mountain climbing story. that's german, ain't it? y'all like climbin mountains, don'tch?
well i speak the most italian, so i'll be your escort. donowitz speaks the second most, so he'll be your italian cameraman. and hirschberg third most, so he'll be donnys assistant.
utivich is the chauffeur.
no worries, son. we got over fourteen hours before the movie tomorrow. more then enough time for you to learn to drive.
oh yes yes yes yes, private, it is. and yes yes yes yes, you will. look utivich, you and i both know, if we went to grade school together, you damn sure ain't copyin off of my test. well i lern't to drive in four hours on a tennessee mountain road. and i'm a shit for brains coal miner bootlegger. hirschberg, you know how to drive, right?
teach 'em.
i4argheriti.
margheriti.
utivich?
no i do not.
john waynes a pampered movie star. he burst into tears, if his cook, busts his yoke at breakfast. just try puttin a bag over his head, and hear what kinda sounds he makes. utivich, giggles through the tears.
i just want you to know, son, i was real proud of you tonight. learnin how to drive overnight. driving in that limo line. you was in the hot seat, son, and you stood up real good. utivich cries louder. aldo takes his foot, finds utivichs foot, and places his foot on top. the touch has a slight calming effect on utivich. in the darkness, utivich has reclaimed his dignity.
where is my men? where is bridget von hammersmark?
what kinda deal?
you just say, bingo.
yes, sir? we hear the voice on the other end of the radio, give aldo his
yes, sir. the conversation is over, he puts the radio down. the three men look at one another. landa picks up his wine.
thank you very much colonel. uitivich, cuff the colonel's hands behind his back.
i'm a slave to appearances. then aldo takes the luger, and shoots herrman dead. the bound col.landa is appalled.
raw i don't think so, more like i'll be chewed out. i've been chewed out before. you know, uitvich and myself, heard that deal you made with the brass. end the war tonight? i'd make that deal. how bout you uitivich, you make that deal?
i don't blame ya. damn good deal. and that pretty little nest ya feathered for yourself. well, if your willing to barbecue the whole high command, i suppose that's worth certain considerations. now i don't care about you gettin pensions, merit badges, ticker tape parades, who gives a damn, let's all go home. but .1do have one question? when you go to your little place on nantuckett island, i image you gonna take off that handsome looking ss uniform of yours, ain't ya? for the first time in the movie, col.landa doesn't-respond.
that's what i thought. now that.  .i can't abide. how bout you uitivich, can you abide it?
i mean if i had my way, you'd wear that goddamn uniform for the rest of your pecker suckin life. but i'm aware that's ain't practical. i mean at some point ya gotta hafta take it off. he opens landass dagger, and holds the blade in front of hans face.
so i'm gonna give you a little somethin you can't take off.
you know somethin uitivich, i think this just might be my masterpiece.