whu? uh, nothing! monkey! mantis! crane! viper! tigress! rowrrrr. coming! sorry, dad. oh, nothing. just had a crazy dream. huh? what was i. eh, i was dreaming about uh. heh. noodles. uh, yeah. what else would i be dreaming about? careful, that soup is. sharp! uh. a sign of what? dad dad dad, it was just a dream. but dad, didn't you ever, i dunno, want to do something else? something besides noodles? so why didn't you?! i know. is here. oop. sorry. sorry. suck it up. oop! sorry! a thousand pardons. what?! master oogway's choosing the dragon warrior! today! everyone! everyone! go! get to the jade palace! one of the five is gonna get the dragon scroll! we've been waiting a thousand years for this! just take the bowl! this is the greatest day in kung fu history! don't worry about it, just go! to the. jade palace? selling noodles? but dad, you know, i was kinda thinking maybe i. i was kinda thinking maybe i. could also sell the bean buns. they are about to go bad. yeah, ha ha, glad i had it. come on! come on, ya-- almost there. what? no! oh no! no. i'll bring me back a souvenir. yeah! oh no! no no no! wait! i'm coming! hey! open the door! let me in! the furious five! peeky-hole! yeah! woo! the thousand tongues of fire! hey, get out of the way! ow. i know!! huh? oh no! wait! yeah! what does it look like i'm doing? stop! stop! i'm going to see the dragon warrior! i lied. i don't dream about noodles, dad! i love kung fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu- okay. uh oh. what's going on? where. uh? what are you pointing--? oh. okay. sorry. i just wanted to see who the dragon warrior was. who--? me? what? wait a second! hello? uh. i think there's been a slight mistake. everyone seems to think that i'm, uh. whoa. the sacred hall of warriors. no way! would you look at this place! nooo! ohhhh! the legendary urn of whispering warriors! said to contain the souls of the entire tenshu army. hellooo? sorry. i should've come to see you first. oh. well, i mean, it's not like you were going anywhere. sure. hey, how's it going? now how do you get five thousand-- master shifu! someone. broke that. but i'm gonna fix it. do you have some glue? ow! ooh. splinter. uh. i guess so? whoa. so how does this work? you have a ladder or trampoline or? no, i. someone like me? those are sensitive in the flabby parts. hey. now wait a minute. that's a little uncalled-for. listen. oogway said that i was the- the wuxi finger hold?! not the wuxi finger hold! developedbymasterwuxiinthethirddyna sty-- yes. no no no! okay! okay! take it easy. yeah, we're clear. we're clear. we are so clear. wait wait wait. what? now? oh, okay. well-- i don't know if i can do all of those moves. uh, yeah. it's just, maybe we can find something more suited to my level. well, ya know. i'm not a master, but uh, let's just start at zero, level zero. hey! maybe i can start with that. whoa. the furious five. you're so much bigger than your action figures -- except for you, mantis. you're about the same. um, are they gonna watch? or should i just wait until they get back to work or something. ok. i mean, i just ate. so i'm still digesting. so my kung fu might not be as good as later on. alright. whatcha got? you got nothing cause i got it right here. you picking on my friends? get ready to feel the thunder. i'm comin' at him with the crazy feet. whatcha gonna do about my crazy feet? i'm a blur. i'm a blur. you never seen bear style, you only seen praying mantis! or. i could come at you monkey style. or. i'm comin' at ya snikity-snake. alright. alright. how's tha-- ow, that hurts. feeling a little nauseous. ow, those are hard! ooh! i think oooohoohoo. my tenders. how did i do? okay. great. oh hey. hi. you're up. i was just uh. some day huh? that kung fu stuff is hard work, right? your biceps sore? yeah yeah yeah, of course. it's just. i'm such a big fan. you guys were totally amazing at the battle of weeping river. outnumbered a thousand to one, but you didn't stop, and then you just. hi-yah! ooo, sorry about that. i know. i know. you're right. i just - my whole life i've dreamed of- oh, okay. right right. yeah, you want to get to sleep. i'm keepin' you up. we got big things tomorrow. alright. you're awesome. last thing i'm gonna say. okay. bye bye. what was that? okay. alright. goodnight. sleep well. seemed a little bit awkward. master tigress! didn't mean to wake you. just uh. uh, yeah, yeah. of course. this is your room. big fan. is that what this is? i am so sorry. i thought it was just a regular peach tree. upset? i'm not upset. what makes you think i'm upset? i probably sucked more today than anyone in the history of kung fu, in the history of china, in the history of sucking. and the five. man, you should have seen them, they totally hate me. how's shifu ever going to turn me into the dragon warrior? i mean, i'm not like the five. i've got no claws, no wings, no venom. even mantis has those. . thingies. maybe i should just quit and go back to making noodles. hey! huh. good morning, master! i thought i'd warm up a little. stuck?! whaa? pfft. stuck. yeah, i'm stuck. maybe on three. one. two- threeeee. thank you. no really, i appreci-- yeah, excellent! i was born ready-- eaghhh. that was awesome! let's go again. alright! let's go! oh, yeah! but a real warrior never quits. don't worry, master, i will never quit! aaaoo. whoohoo. eeeee. hee- hee. i thought you said acupuncture would make me feel better. fat? sure you were. ow! ow! don't. stop it, stop-- yow! i know master shifu's trying to inspire me and all, but if i didn't know any better, i'd say he was trying to get rid of me. no. before what? guys, guys. i know about tai lung. he was a student, the first ever to master the thousand. scrolls of. kung fu. and. then he turned bad. and now he's in jail. doieeeee. so i'm like, fine, you may be a wolf, you may be the scariest bandit in haijin province. but you're a lousy tipper. i mean, i didn't actually say that, but i thought it. in my mind. if he. could read my mind, he'd have been like, "what?" order up! hope you like it. no, c'mon. you should try my dad's secret ingredient soup. he actually knows the secret ingredient. i guess my body doesn't know it's the dragon warrior yet. i'm gonna need a lot more than dew. and, uh, universe juice. what? you will never be the dragon warrior, unless you lose five hundred pounds and brush your teeth! what is that noise you're making? laughter? i never heard of it! work hard, panda. and maybe, someday. you will have ears like mine. ears. it's not working for you? i thought they were pretty good. of course it's shifu. what do you think i'm doing? ooh! master shifu! what? and here i am saying you got no sense of humor. i'm gonna stop tai. what? you're serious? and i have to-- uh, master oogway will stop him! he did it before, he'll do it again. watch me! come on! how am i supposed to beat tai lung? i can't even beat you to the stairs. ow! you don't believe that! you never believed that! from the first moment i got here, you've been trying to get rid of me. you're not my master. and i'm not the dragon warrior. yeah, i stayed. i stayed because every time you threw a brick at my head or said i smelled, it hurt. but it could never hurt more than it did every day of my life just being me. i stayed because i thought if anyone could change me, could make me. not me, it was you. the greatest kung fu teacher in all of china. c'mon, tai lung is on his way here right now. and even if it takes him a hundred years to get here, how are you gonna change this. . into the dragon warrior? how? how? how?! that's what i thought. what? i eat when i'm upset, okay? don't tell monkey. yeah, i know. i disgust you. i don't know. i guess i-- i don't know. i was getting a cookie. no, this. this is just an accident. i know you're trying to be all mystical and kung fu-y, but could you at least tell me where we're going? you dragged me all the way out here for a bath?! the pool of. yeah. okay! okay. oh great, `cause i'm hungry. just like that? no situps? no ten mile hike? hey! hey! am i? i'm not hungry. master. done well? done well?! i've done awesome! huh? guys? guys! they're dead? no, they're breathing! they're asleep?! no, their eyes are open. who? tai lung? stronger? uh, it might, i mean, a little. i'm pretty scared. are you kidding? if they can't-- they're five masters. i'm just one me. you really believe i'm ready? wait, what happens when i read it? whoa! really? that's cool. wow! can i punch through walls? can i do a quadruple back flip? will i have invisibility-- huh? oh, yeah. yeah. whooaa!!! it's impossible to open. come on baby. come on now. thank you. i probably loosened it up for you though. okay, here goes. aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! it's blank! here! look! okay. so like, oogway was just a crazy old turtle after all? oh, come on! face it. he picked me by accident. of course i'm not the dragon warrior. who am i kidding? what? but shifu, he'll kill you. hey, dad. good to be back. i don't know, dad. honestly, sometimes i can't believe i'm actually your son. okay. oh. huh? wait wait. it's just plain old noodle soup? you don't add some kind of special sauce or something? there is no secret ingredient. hey! stairs. buddy, i am the dragon warrior. huhhh. don't tempt me. haha. no. i'm gonna use this. you want it? come and get it. lightning! it's okay. i didn't get it the first time either. there is no secret ingredient. it's just you. aaaaggghh! stop! stop it! i'm gonna pee! don't! don't! i'm not a big, fat panda. i'm the big, fat panda. oh, you know this hold? nope. i figured it out. skadoosh! thanks, dad. hey, guys. master? master shifu! master! shifu! shifu! are you okay? no, master, i didn't die. i defeated tai lung! no! master! no no no! don't die, shifu. please. oh. so, um, i should. stop talking? want to get something to eat?