hello? anybody home?
hi, joanie.
i just got in from hawaii and thought i'd drop by for a minute. what the heck happened in here?
oh really? that's awful.
well, can't you give me one minute? i'd like to know if you got the manuscript i sent you. who's that?
oh, i have? anyway, did you read it?
i'm talking about the book i've written about red and me, that i sent you a copy of, is that so hard to follow?
not just about him, joanie, he's only one of many episodes in my life, you know that. have you got a perrier?
i'm not going to be home. i'm checking into a hospital to have a bone spur removed from my foot. then i'm going to new york, to meet with a top publisher.  .  which, incidentally, i would not care for mr. redmon, fecal- face layls to know. melvenos and the fingerprinter re-enter: *
and to top it off, my lawyer said, 'don't worry, they're just pissing into the wind'
some help i'm going to get from him, because he's scared to death of red.
yes, he's afraid, they're all afraid, they're all off skiing.
yes, i'm going to new york, where i intend to remain in semi-private seclusion, at an undisclosed.
wait, i just want you to hear what this colosal shit said about me, through his great white shark of a lawyer.
fine, why don't you take my house then?
gee whiz, why make such a big deal out of everything?
i just got off a plane that almost fell into the pacific ocean like a piece of rotten fruit.  .  but did i mention it?
joan? it's andy.  are you there? i want to inform you that these people are drugging me.
there's no phone in my room, or cable tv. i've had to sneak into this cell next to me, with some poor lithium zombie lying here like a comatose cabbage.
and this is the lengths this assassin is willing to go to suppress me, because he does not want me to have my book.
oh you're there. thank god.
no, that's what i'm telling you. i went into the hospital first, for one day, just to have a simple bone spur.
 and the next thing i know i'm transported some place the hell else, against my knowledge, while i was completely medicated.
do you understand the implications of this, i have no underpants on, and absolutely no recourse to my rights! joan sits up, and in her alarm is unaware that one of her hands grabs hold of a swatch of hair on harry's chest, causing him to wince:
yes, it's because of red, isn't that obvious!? evidencing interest in their exchange, harry manages to reach to his cigarettes on the night stand.
and if he and that fuckface lawyer in his paid employ, think they can .  wait. i think i hear someone.
i told you, i don't know where i am, these bastards are very clever. she looks at the heavily-meshed wires covering the window:
i'm in some private cracker box in the boonies, with godammed wires on the windows.
mount haven, it's in the south bay, and don't ask me these inane * questions, just do something.  *
i hear someone coming, i have to get off.
and if this little kinglet of corporate shit thinks he can get away with this, he's greatly mistaken. just wait 'til he hears what i'm going to come out with now.
remember when he passed me off as staff and i was put on official government payroll all through maui and the yucatan mission?
yes you do, remember, when i almost died of the vomito negro? well that's when he was doing all that illegal oil drilling off the mexican gulf.  she turns to look critically at her face in the mirror:
have you got any lipstick?
who's he?
and this man, who wouldn't know the truth if it came up and spit him in the eye, is accusing me of lying.  she hands him the skirt out through the window:
you know what that prick had his lawyer say to me?
that i was a pretty, grudge- bearing little malcontent, grasping at some splinter of celebrity for myself at his expense. can you believe that? she hands him out the blouse and he turns politely away from her semi-nudity as he hands her the doctor's jacket.
i mean, the arrogance.  what did she say your name was?
have you got a cigarette, harry?
you son of a bitch!
who the hell do you think it is?!
no thanks to you, it's me. .  and throws them onto the dashboard.
i need a kleenex. she moves toward the nightstand with joan following:
wait, i want to tell you what he said to me.  she extracts a tissue from a dispenser on the nightstand:
he said i was the only woman he's ever really cared for.
and when he said it.  .  he had a tear in his eye.
well, after all i do love him.
yes, he's been a very important man in my life, you know that.
i don't know where she got that. will you please keep your voice down. he's very sensitive to what people say.
are you implying that i have defective judgement in men, joanie?
oh that's just all talk.  would somebody please get me my clothes!
who is this guy, anyway? isn't he a little sleazy, joanie, a bit infra dig? i mean lewie's a bit of a stiff, but.
oh, 'him.'
well, he's very immature.
will you please stop interfering in my personal life, joanie.
well if you're going to take this kind of grumpy attitude, i certainly won't.
well red, better a woman than dead, don't you think? she reaches down and proprietarily brushes the scarf from his shoulders.
so let's just go there, sweetheart, and have him sew the darn thing in.