oooo-oo-ooh, baby. i love your way.
those guys are a waste of money! i'll show you how to stop sucking your thumb.
sunday nights this fall
just kiddin', folks! drinks for everybody -
thank you, thank you for that very modest
we've got a special dedication tonight. this one's from my ever-lovin' boss, mr. stu mopey - i mean miley - and we're sendin' it up to a very special lady in the land of the living. yes, i do mean julie - the beautiful miss julie - who, if she has a brain in her head, is shacked up right now with some good-lookin' doc she met in the e.r.! just kidding, buddy! because if we know anything about miss julie, we know she is faithful, loyal, and true. even if her boyfriend is an eggplant. which is why we're dedicating. this very special tune. to her. jumbo?
mah baby does the hanky-panky! unhh! mah baby does the hanky-panky! unhh!
i doubt that. besides, i can't help myself. i'm just a figment of your imagination.
aw, come on. you know you love me. you're a masochistic pain freak. you gotta love me.
you are too! mooning over julie when we could both be gettin' some o' this fine local action. it's not like she's gonna know. out of town, under five minutes, and in a coma don't count.
hellooooooooo, kitty.
i'd like something with an umbrella in it and a really smutty name. like a. sex behind the sofa with your parents in the same room watching "the brady bunch."
aaah, it's the same as always. poor mope's just wishin' he was me.
my fellow americans. i have a dream. let us boldly go where no man has gone before.
come on, pal! it was a compliment! you'da done the same if you had the equipment!
forget it! no way! i'm not getting -
i'm reportin' this to my union!!
the sidekicks' union! me, tonto, and robin the boy wonder. you top bananas better watch your ass!
dive! dive!!
i left my phone number in your undies. try not to lose it in traffic.
him. whew. about time!
maybe he wanted to pick out his own casket?
stu? stu? let's not disturb the nice reaper.
let's not kick the nice reaper's ass.
stu? stu? let's calm down, talk things over. how about some comedy relief? okay. brontosaurus walks into a gay bar.
stu? stu? i think weve got this backwards. your behavior. is disturbing me.
now this. is livin'.
y'call that art? why, my three-year-old can paint better than that.
hey! like the do. so tell me, are you a, uhh.  natural snakehead?
fifty dollars?! bite me!
i knew i left it in there somewhere.
you said it, partner!
stu.  it's a party.
pact? pact? no life support??
pull the plug! pull the plug! take my organs! i don't need 'em! i don't need no! life support! i'm an idiot! pull the pl--
i'm so dumb! i deserve to die -
the penthouse is pretty swank, though.
me too. and i mean anything. ask the chicks in the back room.
fate worse than death! well, it's been real, boss, but i gotta go buff up my resum. anybody here need a figment?
stu, you have my absolute confidence. - dead man! dead man walking!!
hey. aren't you gonna talk me into it?
you gotta talk me into it. you'll screw up on your own. i mean, a guy's gotta have a sidekick. for moral support! wisecracks - snappy banter - it's the land of death, stu, the land of death! don't go in there without your comedy relief!!
oh, thank you! thank you! th-- something went very, very wrong here.
is that what they call "death with dignity"?
two words for you, my friend: club soda.
oh, sure. mr. action hero! why couldn't i be arnold schwarzenegger's figment?
i don't know.
say, death, just out of curiosity, could we maybe swap jobs with that other guy? see, we've been meaning to drop in on dark town - i mean i've been meaning to.
i got relatives there. i. eep!!
yowie.
stu. stu.
there's a thing here! there's a switch!
stu. look!
isn't that lulu?
weren't we just here?
what'd i tell you? you go to the land of death, wear a jockstrap!
this ain't my nightmare!
move it. we got exactly five minutes left.
oh, don't you worry. i'll be fine.
awwww. worried about my feelings, are you? well, there's a new twist.
love you too. boss.
death, i'd like to point out that none of this was my fault. the roots of this tragedy go back to a callous, uncaring society that -