hello?
yes?
who?
oh, yes! i'm with a patient now. can you call back at two fifteen?
then give me your number. i'll call you tonite. hello? hello?
ha! hi! come in. it's ok, they all do that.
hmm.  jarrett. how long since you've been out of the hospital?
feeling depressed?
on stage?
people nervous.  treating you like you're . a dangerous character?
are you?
how long were you in the hospital?
what did you do?
it doesn't say what your method was.
oh.
friends?
ok?
everything.
you're back in school? everything okay at school? teachers?
no problems?
so why are you here?
why?
who's worried about you?
what about your mother? isn't she worried about you, too?
well, as long as you're straight.
yes. he called me on the phone. he told me your name and.  he told me to look for you. and, uh.  he said you had a brother who died. a.  boating accident, wasn't it? want to tell me about it?
how did that go?
why do you want to change?
why?
well. i'll tell you something. i'll be straight with you, okay? i'm not big on control. but it's your money.
so to speak. okay.
well. control's a tough nut.
well. that's a problem. how do we solve that?
well. it's up to you.
mm-mmm.
i don't hold much stock in dreams.
really? what's happening? what's going on?
what?
look. kiddo.  i lied. i do believe in dreams. only sometimes i want to know what's happening when you're awake. come on, something's bugging you, making you nervous. you're making me nervous.
tranquilizer?
i think you came in here looking like something out of the body snatchers. it's not my impression that you need a tranquilizer.
clock.
mmm, mmm.
right.
ha, ha.
ha, ha.
ah, ah?.  have you ever thought about quitting?
no.
forget about how it looks! how does it feel?
yes!
yes! how does it feel?
are you the same person you were last year?
that's why you need a tranquilizer?
no. it's up to you!
not necessarily.
is anyplace easy?
it was? why?
was there anyone there you could talk to?
i mean, besides dr. crawford?
what do you expect from her?
why not?
what are you thinking?
so what else is new? does it help?
what now?
who?
yeah. what about him?
so much as what?
what would john boy have said?
come on.
don't hold back.
so, what did your dad say about it?
how come?
can you tell your mother?
no. sorry's out. come on, something's on your mind.
no, no, never mind the time. there's time. look. remember the contract? control? maybe there's some connection between control and uh.   what do we call it? - lack of feeling? mmm?
when?
when?
come on, come on, jarrett, i thought you didn't like to fool around.
like to play games, do you?
so?
i'll tell you what i want. i want you to leave "i don't know" out there on the table with the magazines. okay?
yeah. that would be nice. make one up. right now. about how there's no feelings in there.
oh! now you have, now you don't! get it together, jarrett.
are you mad?
oh, cut the shit! you're mad! you're mad as hell! you don't like being pushed. so why don't you do something about it!
tell me to fuck off! i don't know.
why not?
why not?
do you know how much energy it takes to hold it back?
oh! i beg your pardon! i never promised you a rose garden.
what?
yeah?
that's it!
what do you think?
sounds good to me.
a little advice about feeling, kiddo.  don't expect it always to tickle.
tuesday you felt great. you bought a christmas tree, it was all hunky- dory. okay?
don't take refuge in one-liners like "you're the doctor". okay? because that pisses me off.
so everything was fine till you had the fight with your mother, then everything was lousy.
what shit have you pulled? hey! remember! i'm talking proportion here. now, what shit?
uh, uh.
what?
what?
well a real problem.  a real problem has a real solution.
doesn't make it any less true.
yeah, well.  that's a hell of a secret you've been keeping on yourself.
recognize her limitations.
oh, kiddo, no. like she can't love you enough. like don't blame her for not loving you more than she's able.
ha! now we're back to the rotten kid routine! she can't love you because you're unlovable. where does that leave your dad? how come he loves you? you're a rottenkid, doesn't he know that?
ho, i get it! the guy's got no taste! he loves you, but he's wrong. look.  maybe she just can't express it the way you'd like her to. maybe she's just afraid to show you what she feels.
i mean there's someone besides your mother you've got to forgive.
why don't you give yourself a break? let yourself off the hook?
we'll talk about it on thursday.
time's up.
come on, con. you know the rules.
you think about it. just think about it.
okay.
neither do i.
well, you said you.  thought you could shed some light on some things. what did you mean by that?
but you still feel responsible?
you think of yourself as a lucky man, then?
that sounds more like the philosophy of a drifter than a tax attorney.
what would you want to do about that?
and you see them as on . opposite sides of this fence?
for what?
did she give buck much affection to . buck?
and you?
what i mean is, your wife's affection.
yes.
mm-hmm. very private.
okay. why don't we?
hello?
what's going on?
what time is it?
where are you?
all right. listen to me. get to the office somehow, and i'll meet you there.
oh, good. you're here.
just wait, just hold on.
just wait till we get inside.
shit. you'd think they'd assume there'd be an emergency now and then?!
what?
it's what?
what do you need? tell me!
don't try.
for what?
what did you do?
what did you do?
point? what point? it happened!
i know that, it wasn't your fault.
and that wasn't fair, was it?
because i got tired!
it hurts to be mad at him, doesn't it?
bad things happen even when people are careful.
ok, so you made a mistake.
maybe you were stronger. did it ever occur to you that you might have been stronger?
why don't you?
i know.
jesus.
no. she wasn't.
what?
and what?
you saw her once and now you' want to take her on too?
no?
what?
okay. listen. i feel bad about it too.
you're right. it isn't fair.
um-hmm. and what was the one wrong thing you did?
you know.
you know.
exactly.
now. you can live with that. can't you?
feelings are scary. and sometimes they're painful. and if you can't feel pain, then you're not gonna feel anything else either. you know what i'm saying?
you're here and you're alive. and don't tell me you don't feel that.
it is good. believe me.
because i'm your friend.
i am. count on it.