– okay now, tell me about the hash bars?
well, hash is legal there, right?
those are hash bars?
that did it, man – i'm fuckin' goin', that's all there is to it.
what?
examples?
they don't call it a quarter pounder with cheese?
what'd they call it?
royale with cheese. what'd they call a big mac?
le big mac. what do they call a whopper?
what?
goddamn!
uuccch!
we should have shotguns for this kind of deal.
three or four.
i'm not sure.
it's possible.
mia.
i dunno, however people meet people. she usta be an actress.
i think her biggest deal was she starred in a pilot.
well, you know the shows on tv?
yes, but you're aware that there's an invention called television, and on that invention they show shows?
well, the way they pick the shows on tv is they make one show, and that show's called a pilot. and they show that one show to the people who pick the shows, and on the strength of that one show, they decide if they want to make more shows. some get accepted and become tv programs, and some don't, and become nothing. she starred in one of the ones that became nothing.
you remember antwan rockamora? half- black, half-samoan, usta call him tony rocky horror.
i wouldn't go so far as to call the brother fat. he's got a weight problem. what's the nigger gonna do, he's samoan.
well, marsellus fucked his ass up good. and word around the campfire, it was on account of marsellus wallace's wife.
no no no no no no no, nothin' that bad.
he gave her a foot massage.
sent a couple of guys over to his place. they took him out on the patio of his apartment, threw his ass over the balcony. nigger fell four stories. they had this garden at the bottom, enclosed in glass, like one of them greenhouses – nigger fell through that. since then, he's kinda developed a speech impediment.
whaddya mean?
you don't think he overreacted?
it was a foot massage, a foot massage is nothing, i give my mother a foot massage.
whoa.  whoa.  whoa.  stop right there. eatin' a bitch out, and givin' a bitch a foot massage ain't even the same fuckin' thing.
it ain't no ballpark either. look maybe your method of massage differs from mine, but touchin' his lady's feet, and stickin' your tongue in her holyiest of holyies, ain't the same ballpark, ain't the same league, ain't even the same fuckin' sport. foot massages don't mean shit.
don't be tellin' me about foot massages – i'm the foot fuckin' master.
shit yeah. i got my technique down man, i don't tickle or nothin'.
fuck you.
fuck you.
man, you best back off, i'm gittin' pissed – this is the door.
what time is it?
it ain't quite time, let's hang back.
look, just because i wouldn't give no man a foot massage, don't make it right for marsellus to throw antwan off a building into a glass- motherfuckin-house, fuckin' up the way the nigger talks. that ain't right, man. motherfucker do that to me, he better paralyze my ass, 'cause i'd kill'a motherfucker.
that's an interesting point, but let's get into character.
mia. why you so interested in big man's wife?
take care of her?
you're gonna be takin' mia wallace out on a date?
hey kids.
how you boys doin'?
am i trippin', or did i just ask you a question.
do you know who we are?
we're associates of your business partner marsellus wallace, you remember your business partner dont'ya?
now i'm gonna take a wild guess here: you're brett, right?
i thought so. well, you remember your business partner marsellus wallace, dont'ya brett?
good for you. looks like me and vincent caught you at breakfast, sorry 'bout that. what'cha eatin'?
hamburgers. the cornerstone of any nutritious breakfast. what kinda hamburgers?
no, i mean where did you get'em? macdonald's, wendy's, jack-in-the- box, where?
big kahuna burger. that's that hawaiian burger joint. i heard they got some tasty burgers. i ain't never had one myself, how are they?
mind if i try one of yours?
yours is this one, right?
uuummmm, that's a tasty burger. vince, you ever try a big kahuna burger?
you wanna bite, they're real good.
well, if you like hamburgers give 'em a try sometime. me, i can't usually eat 'em 'cause my girlfriend's a vegetarian. which more or less makes me a vegetarian, but i sure love the taste of a good burger. you know what they call a quarter pounder with cheese in france?
tell 'em, vincent.
royale with cheese, you know why they call it that?
check out the big brain on brett. you'a smart motherfucker, that's right. the metric system. what's in this?
sprite, good, mind if i have some of your tasty beverage to wash this down with?
uuuuummmm, hit's the spot! you, flock of seagulls, you know what we're here for?
then why don't you tell my boy here vince, where you got the shit hid.
– i don't remember askin' you a goddamn thing. you were sayin'?
we happy?
vincent!
we happy?
my name's pitt, and you ain't talkin' your ass outta this shit.
oh, i'm sorry. did that break your concentration? i didn't mean to do that. please, continue. i believe you were saying something about "best intentions."
whatsamatter? oh, you were through anyway. well, let me retort. would you describe for me what marsellus wallace looks like?
what country you from!
"what" ain't no country i know! do they speak english in "what?"
english-motherfucker-can-you-speak- it?
then you understand what i'm sayin'?
now describe what marsellus wallace looks like!
say "what" again! c'mon, say "what" again! i dare ya, i double dare ya motherfucker, say "what" one more goddamn time!
now describe to me what marsellus wallace looks like!
– go on!
– does he look like a bitch?!
does-he-look-like-a-bitch?!
then why did you try to fuck 'im like a bitch?!
yes ya did brett. ya tried ta fuck 'im. you ever read the bible, brett?
there's a passage i got memorized, seems appropriate for this situation: ezekiel 25:17. "the path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. blessed is he who, in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness, for he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. and i will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. and you will know my name is the lord when i lay my vengeance upon you."
you ever read the bible, brett?
there's a passage i got memorized, seems appropriate for this situation: ezekiel 25:17. "the path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men"
". blessed is he who, in the name of charity and good will, shepherded the weak through the valley of darkness. and i will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. and you will know i am the lord when i lay my vengeance upon you."
yeah, marvin-vincent-vincent-marvin.
we should be fuckin' dead right now. did you see that gun he fired at us? it was bigger than him.
we should be fuckin' dead!
that shit wasn't luck. that shit was somethin' else.
that was.  divine intervention. you know what divine intervention is?
yeah, man, that's what is means. that's exactly what it means! god came down from heaven and stopped the bullets.
don't do that! don't you fuckin' do that! don't blow this shit off! what just happened was a fuckin' miracle!
wrong, wrong, this shit doesn't just happen.
we should be fuckin' dead now, my friend! we just witnessed a miracle, and i want you to fuckin' acknowledge it!
if you wanna play blind man, then go walk with a shepherd. but me, my eyes are wide fuckin' open.
that's it for me. for here on in, you can consider my ass retired.
don't blaspheme!
– i said don't do that –
i'm tellin' marsellus today i'm through.
don't worry, i will.
i don't give a damn if he does.
what the fuck's happening?
why the fuck did you do that?
i've seen a lot of crazy-ass shit in my time –
the car didn't hit no motherfuckin' bump!
look at this mess! we're drivin' around on a city street in broad daylight –
well you better be thinkin' about it now, motherfucker! we gotta get this car off the road. cops tend to notice shit like you're driving a car drenched in fuckin' blood.
this is the valley, vincent. marsellus don't got no friendly places in the valley.
a buddy of mine in toluca lake.
on the other side of the hill, by burbank studios. if jimmie's ass ain't home, i don't know what the fuck we're gonna go. i ain't got any other partners in 818. jimmie! how you doin' man, it's jules. listen up man, me an' my homeboy are in some serious shit. we're in a car we gotta get off the road, pronto! i need to use your garage for a couple hours.
we gotta be real fuckin' delicate with this jimmie's situation. he's one remark away from kickin' our asses out the door.
well, we ain't leavin' 'til we made a couple phone calls. but i never want it to reach that pitch. jimmie's my friend and you don't bust in your friend's house and start tellin' 'im what's what.
put yourself in his position. it's eight o'clock in the morning. he just woke up, he wasn't prepared for this shit. don't forget who's doin' who a favor.
what the fuck did you just do to his towel?
you're supposed to wash 'em first.
i watched you get 'em wet.
i used the same soap you did and when i dried my hands, the towel didn't look like a fuckin' maxie pad. look, fuck it, alright. who cares? but it's shit like this that's gonna bring this situation to a boil. if he were to come in here and see that towel like that.  i'm tellin' you vincent, you best be cool. 'cause if i gotta get in to it with jimmie on account of you.  look, i ain't threatenin' you, i respect you an' all, just don't put me in that position.
jules, you ask me nice like that, no problem. he's your friend, you handle him.
goddamn jimmie, this is some serious gourmet shit. me an' vincent woulda been satisfied with freeze-dried tasters choice. you spring this gourmet fuckin' shit on us. what flavor is this?
what?
jimmie –
naw man, i didn't.
why?
jimmie –
that's all we want. we don't wanna fuck up your shit. we just need to call our people to bring us in.
you got to appreciate what an explosive element this bonnie situation is. if she comes home from a hard day's work and finds a bunch of gangsters doin' a bunch of gangsta' shit in her kitchen, ain't no tellin' what she's apt to do.
i don't wanna hear about no motherfuckin' "ifs."what i wanna hear from your ass is: "you ain't got no problems, jules. i'm on the motherfucker. go back in there, chill them niggers out and wait for the cavalry, which should be comin' directly."
you sendin' the wolf?
shit negro, that's all you had to say.
aside from how it looks, the car's cool.
hey man, as far as i know, the motherfucker's tip-top.
it ain't that way, mr. wolf. your help is definitely appreciated.
i will never forgive your ass for this shit. this is some fucked-up repugnant shit!
man, get outta my face with that shit! the motherfucker who said that never had to pick up itty-bitty pieces of skull with his fingers on account of your dumb ass.
you're gettin' ready to blow? i'm a mushroom-cloud-layin' motherfucker! every time my fingers touch brain i'm "superfly t.n.t," i'm the "guns of navarone." i'm what jimmie walker usta talk about. in fact, what the fuck am i doin' in the back? you're the motherfucker should be on brain detail. we're tradin'. i'm washin' windows and you're pickin' up this nigger's skull.
this morning air is some chilly shit.
now jimmie, don't do nothin' stupid like puttin' that out in front of your house for elmo the garbage man to take away.
goddamn, that water's fuckin' cold!
ha ha ha. they're your clothes, motherfucker.
yeah, well, our asses ain't the expert on wearin' dorky shit that your is.
don't do shit unless –
unless you do it first.
we cool?
inglewood.
mr. wolf.
i was a pleasure watchin' you work.
wanna share a cab?
sure.
naw, i don't eat pork.
i ain't jewish man, i just don't dig on swine.
they're filthy animals. i don't eat filthy animals.
a sewer rat may taste like pumpkin pie. i'll never know 'cause even if it did, i wouldn't eat the filthy motherfucker. pigs sleep and root in shit. that's a filthy animal. i don't wanna eat nothin' that ain't got enough sense to disregard its own feces.
i don't eat dog either.
i wouldn't go so far as to call a dog filthy, but they're definitely dirty. but a dog's got personality. and personality goes a long way.
we'd have to be talkin' 'bout one motherfuckin' charmin' pig. it'd have to be the cary grant of pigs.
i just been sittin' here thinkin'.
the miracle we witnessed.
do you know that a miracle is?
what's an act of god?
don't you see, vince, that shit don't matter. you're judging this thing the wrong way. it's not about what. it could be god stopped the bullets, he changed coke into pepsi, he found my fuckin' car keys. you don't judge shit like this based on merit. whether or not what we experienced was an according-to-hoyle miracle is insignificant. what is significant is i felt god's touch, god got involved.
that's what's fuckin' wit' me! i don't know why. but i can't go back to sleep.
the life, most definitely.
that's what i've been sitting here contemplating. first, i'm gonna deliver this case to marsellus. then, basically, i'm gonna walk the earth.
you know, like caine in "kung fu." just walk from town to town, meet people, get in adventures.
until god puts me where he want me to be.
if it takes forever, i'll wait forever.
i'll just be jules, vincent – no more, no less.
look my friend, this is just where me and you differ –
all shapes and sizes, vince.
if you find my answers frightening, vincent, you should cease askin' scary questions.
my boss' dirty laundry.
when he wants it clean.
funny, i've been thinkin' the same thing.
'fraid i can't do that.
yes, you did.
i don't mean to shatter your ego, but this ain't the first time i've had gun pointed at me.
keep your fuckin' mouth closed, fat man, this ain't any of your goddamn business!
you win.
it's all yours, ringo.
tell that bitch to be cool! say, bitch be cool! say, bitch be cool!
tell her it's gonna be okay.
promise her.
tell her to chill.
what's her name?
so, we cool yolanda? we ain't gonna do anything stupid, are we?
nobody's gonna hurt anybody. we're gonna be like three fonzies. and what' fonzie like?
c'mon yolanda, what's fonzie like?
correct-amundo! and that's what we're gonna be, we're gonna be cool. now ringo, i'm gonna count to three and i want you to let go your gun and lay your palms flat on the table. but when you do it, do it cool. ready?
one.  two.  three.
yolanda, i thought you were gonna be cool. when you yell at me, it makes me nervous. when i get nervous, i get scared. and when motherfuckers get scared, that's when motherfuckers get accidentally shot.
that seems to be the situation. now i don't want that and you don't want that and ringo here don't want that. so let's see what we can do. now this is the situation. normally both of your asses would be dead as fuckin' fried chicken. but you happened to pull this shit while i'm in a transitional period. i don't wanna kill ya, i want to help ya. but i'm afraid i can't give you the case. it don't belong to me. besides, i went through too much shit this morning on account of this case to just hand it over to your ass.
it's cool, vincent! it's cool! don't do a goddamn thing. yolanda, it's cool baby, nothin's changed. we're still just talkin'. tell her we're still cool.
nothin' i can't handle. i want you to just hang back and don't do shit unless it's absolutely necessary.
yolanda, how we doin, baby?
just hang in there, baby, you're doing' great, ringo's proud of you and so am i. it's almost over. now i want you to go in that bag and find my wallet.
it's the one that says bad motherfucker on it.
that's my bad motherfucker. now open it up and take out the cash. how much is there?
put it in your pocket, it's yours. now with the rest of them wallets and the register, that makes this a pretty successful little score.
you ain't gonna do a goddamn thing, now hang back and shut the fuck up. besides, i ain't givin' it to him. i'm buyin' somethin' for my money. wanna know what i'm buyin' ringo?
your life. i'm givin' you that money so i don't hafta kill your ass. you read the bible?
there's a passage i got memorized. ezekiel 25:17. "the path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. blessed is he who, in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of the darkness. for he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. and i will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. and you will know i am the lord when i lay my vengeance upon you." i been sayin' that shit for years. and if you ever heard it, it meant your ass. i never really questioned what it meant. i thought it was just a coldblooded thing to say to a motherfucker 'fore you popped a cap in his ass. but i saw some shit this mornin' made me think twice. now i'm thinkin', it could mean you're the evil man. and i'm the righteous man. and mr. .45 here, he's the shepherd protecting my righteous ass in the valley of darkness. or is could by you're the righteous man and i'm the shepherd and it's the world that's evil and selfish. i'd like that. but that shit ain't the truth. the truth is you're the weak. and i'm the tyranny of evil men. but i'm tryin'. i'm tryin' real hard to be a shepherd.
it's cold.
that's probably a good idea.