"like a virgin" is all about a girl who digs a guy with a big dick. the whole song is a metaphor for big dicks.
--whoa. whoa. time out greenbay. tell that bullshit to the tourists.
it's not about a nice girl who meets a sensitive boy. now granted that's what "true blue" is about, no argument about that.
hey, fuck all that, i'm making a point here. you're gonna make me lose my train of thought.
where was i?
let me tell ya what "like a virgin"'s about. it's about some cooze who's a regular fuck machine. i mean all the time, morning, day, night, afternoon, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick.
then one day she meets a john holmes motherfucker, and it's like, whoa baby. this mother fucker's like charles bronson in "the great escape." he's diggin tunnels. now she's gettin this serious dick action, she's feelin something she ain't felt since forever. pain.
it hurts. it hurts her. it shouldn't hurt. her pussy should be bubble-yum by now. but when this cat fucks her, it hurts. it hurts like the first time. the pain is reminding a fuck machine what is was like to be a virgin. hence, "like a virgin."
fuck you, wrong. i'm right! what the fuck do you know about it anyway? you're still listening to jerry-fucking-vale.
yeah, it's fuckin great isn't it?
no, i can't. you know what i heard the other day? "heartbeat - it's lovebeat," by little tony defranco and the defranco family. i haven't heard that since i was in fifth fuckin grade.
you know the part in "gypsies, tramps and theives," when she says "poppa woulda shot his if he knew what he'd done?" i could never figure out what he did.
i love this kid, he's a madman, this guy.
was that a fucking set-up or what?
oh fuck, orange got tagged.
oh that's just fucking great! where's brown?
goddamn, goddamn! how did he die?
oh this is bad, this is so bad. is it bad?
this is so fucked up. somebody fucked us big time.
you even doubt it? i don't think we got set up, i know we got set up! i mean really, seriously, where did all those cops come from, huh? one minute they're not there, the next minute they're there. i didn't hear any sirens. the alarm went off, okay. okay, when an alarm goes off, you got an average of four minutes response time. unless a patrol car is cruising that street, at that particular moment, you got four minutes before they can realistically respond. in one minute there were seventeen blue boys out there. all loaded for bear, all knowing exactly what the fuck they were doing, and they were all just there! remember that second wave that showed up in the cars? those were the ones responding to the alarm. but those other motherfuckers were already there, they were waiting for us. you haven't thought about this?
well, you better start thinking about it. cause i, sure as fuck, am thinking about it. in fact, that's all i'm thinking about. i came this close to just driving off. whoever set us up, knows about this place. there could've been cops sitting here waiting for me. for all we know, there's cops, driving fast, on their way here now.
what the fuck am i doing here? i felt funny about this job right off. as soon as i felt it i should said "no thank you", and walked. but i never fucking listen. every time i ever got burned buying weed, i always knew the guy wasn't right. i just felt it. but i wanted to believe him. if he's not lyin to me, and it really is thai stick, then whoa baby. but it's never thai stick. and i always said if i felt that way about a job, i'd walk. and i did, and i didn't, because of fuckin money!
i'm cool.
why not?
--that's not correct.
the cops didn't show up after the alarm went off. they didn't show till after mr. blonde started shooting everyone.
i'm telling ya, it wasn't that soon. they didn't let their presence be known until after mr. blonde went off. i'm not sayin they weren't there, i'm sayin they were there. but they didn't move in till mr. blonde became a madman. that's how i know we were set up. you can see that, can't you, mr. white?
--don't tell me your name, i don't want to know! i sure as hell ain't gonna tell ya mine.
shot my way out. everybody was shooting, so i just blasted my way outta there.
get outta the car! get the fuck outta the car!
open the fucking door!
tagged a couple of cops. did you kill anybody?
no real people?
could you believe mr. blonde?
i don't wanna kill anybody. but if i gotta get out that door, and you're standing in my way, one way of the other, you're gettin outta my way.
i think he's a sick fuckin maniac! we're awful goddamn lucky he didn't tag us, when he shot up the place. i came this fucking close-- --to taking his ass out myself. everybody panics. when things get tense, everybody panics. everybody. i don't care what your name is, you can't help it. it's human nature. but ya panic on the inside. ya panic in your head. ya give yourself a couple a seconds of panic, then you get a grip and deal with the situation. what you don't do, is shoot up the place and kill everybody.
did ya see what happened to anybody else?
at that point it became every man for himself. as far as mr. blonde or mr. blue are concerned, i ain't got the foggiest. once i got out, i never looked back.
what do i think? i think the cops caught them, or killed 'em.
yeah, and that was a fucking miracle. but if they did get away, where the fuck are they?
nope.
i got the diamonds.
i got 'em, all right?
no, they're not in the car. no, i don't have them on me. ya wanna go with me and get 'em? yes, we can go right now. but first listen to what i'm telling you. we were fuckin set up! somebody is in league with the cops. we got a judas in our midst. and i'm thinkin we should have our fuckin heads examined for waiting around here.
then where is everybody? i say the plan became null and void once we found out we got a rat in the house. we ain't got the slightest fuckin idea what happened to mr. blonde or mr. blue. they could both be dead or arrested. they could be sweatin 'em, down at the station house right now. yeah they don't know the names, but they can sing about this place. i mean, that could be happening right now. as we speak, the cops could be in their cars, drivin here this minute.
what?
no shit?
so who's the rat this time? mr. blue? mr. blonde? joe? it's joe's show, he set this whole thing up. maybe he set it up to set it up.
oh, you and joe go back a long time. i known joe since i was a kid. but me saying joe definitely couldn't have done it is ridiculous. i can say i definitely didn't do it, cause i know what i did or didn't do. but i can't definitely say that about anybody else, 'cause i don't definitely know. for all i know, you're the rat.
now you're using your head. for all we know, he's the rat.
is he dead?
so, is he dead or what?
so what is it?
he scared the fuckin shit outta me. i thought he was dead fer sure.
we can't take him to a hospital.
well, first things first, staying here's goofy. we gotta book up.
you gotta idea, spit it out.
assuming we can trust joe, how we gonna get in touch with him? he's supposed to be here, but he ain't, which is making me nervous about being here. even if joe is on the up and up, he's probably not gonna be that happy with us. joe planned a robbery, but he's got a blood bath on his hands now. dead cops, dead robbers, dead civilians. jesus christ! i tend to doubt he's gonna have a lot of sympathy for our plight. if i was him, i'd try and put as much distance between me and this mess an humanly possible.
well joe ain't gettin here. we're on our own. now, i don't know a goddamn body who can help him, so if you know somebody, call 'em.
well, i guess we drop him off at the hospital. since he don't know nothin about us, i say it's his decision.
you didn't tell him your name, did ya?
why!
and what was tellin him your name when you weren't supposed to?
oh, i don't doubt is was quite beautiful--
one question: do they have a sheet on you, where you told him you're from?
well that's that, then. i mean, i was worried about mug shot possibilities already. but now he knows: what you look like, what your first name is, where you're from and what your specialty is. they ain't gonna hafta show him a helluva lot of pictures for him to pick you out. that's it right, you didn't tell him anything else that could narrow down the selection?
we ain't taking him to a hospital.
and i'm very sad about that. but some fellas are lucky, and some ain't.
ya wanna fuck with me?! you wanna fuck with me?! i'll show you who you're fuckin with!
fuck you, white! i didn't create this situation, i'm just dealin with it. you're acting like a first-year fuckin thief. i'm actin like a professional. they get him, they can get you, they get you, they get closer to me, and that can't happen. and you, you motherfucker, are looking at me like it's my fault. i didn't tell him my name. i didn't tell him where i was from. i didn't tell him what i knew better than to tell him. fuck, fifteen minutes ago, you almost told me your name. you, buddy, are stuck in a situation you created. so if you wanna throw bad looks somewhere, throw 'em at a mirror.
so if you wanna shoot somebody, put that gun in your mouth and shoot yourself.
mr. blonde! you okay? we thought you might've gotten caught. what happened?
really, how did you get away?
you saw what happened to me, i found a hole and booked.
where's mr. blue?
we were hopin you two would be together.
that was the big question we had, what happened to mr. blue and you?
we were worried the cops got ya.
he got it in the belly. he's still alive, but won't be for long.
i guarantee we got a rat in the house.
we don't think this place is safe.
both of you two assholes knock it the fuck off and calm down!
cut the bullshit, we ain't on a fuckin playground! i don't believe this shit, both of you got ten years on me, and i'm the only one actin like a professional. you guys act like a bunch of fuckin niggers. you ever work a job with a bunch of niggers? they're just like you two, always fightin, always sayin they're gonna kill one another.
then. that time has passed. right now, mr. blonde is the only one i completely trust. he's too fuckin homicidal to be workin with the cops.
fuck sides! what we need is a little solidarity here. somebody's stickin a red hot poker up our asses and we gotta find out whose hand's on the handle. now i know i'm no piece of shit.  and i'm pretty sure you're a good boy.  and i'm fuckin positive you're on the level. so let's figure out who's the bad guy.
we still gotta get out of here.
nice guy eddie? what makes you think nice guy's anywhere but on a plane half way to costa rica?
we were set up, the cops were waiting for us.
the cops were there waitin for us!
hey, fuck you man, you weren't there, we were. and i'm tellin ya, the cops had that store staked out.
what the fuck d'you think we've been askin each other?
i don't know, but somebody did.
i told ya he'd be pissed.
brown's dead, we don't know about blue.
so he'll tell us who the fuck set us up.
i got a bag. i stashed it till i could be sure this place wasn't a police station.
he seems all right now, but he went crazy in the store.
we were trying to find out what he knew about the set up.
hey, i know what i'm talkin about, black women ain't the same as white women.
go ahead and laugh, you know what i mean. what a while bitch will put up with, a black bitch won't put up with for a minute. they got a line, and if you cross it, they fuck you up.
i'll make you a bet that those same damn niggers who were showin their ass in public, when their bitches get 'em home, they chill the fuck out.
yeah, those guys too.
the black beverly hills. i knew this lady from ladora heights once. "hi, i'm from ladora heights, it's the black beverly hills."
i was in the sixth grade when that show was on. i totally dug it. what the fuck was the name of the chick who played christie love?
no, it wasn't pan grier, pan grier was the other one. pan grier made the movies. christie love was like a pam grier tv show, without pam grier.
what the fuck was that chick's name? oh this is just great, i'm totally fuckin tortured now.
how would you feel if you had to do a handstand every time you took a piss.
why am i mr. pink?
why can't we pick out our own colors?
yeah, mr. pink sounds like mr. pussy. tell you what, let me be mr. purple. that sounds good to me, i'm mr. purple.
oh that's really easy for you to say, you're mr. white. you gotta cool-sounding name. so tell me, mr. white, if you think "mr. pink" is no big deal, you wanna trade?
jesus christ, joe. fuckin forget it. this is beneath me. i'm mr. pink, let's move on.
i love this guy.
goddamnit, will you guys grow up!
look, he's not sayin this bitch is gonna operate on him. she's gonna give him better attention than we can until we can get a doctor. nobody's forgotten about doctors. joe'll get one in a snap. this is something we're doing in the meantime. i think both of you are actin like a couple of assholes.
he's right about the ear, it's hacked off.
mr. blue's dead?
c'mon, guys, nobody wants this. we're supposed to me fuckin professionals!
don't shoot!