fuck man, call me micky. micky comes up to the car, cleaning his grease covered hands with a hand towel.
i am well sir, well, quite well, the weather is being kind to us but the engines aren't.
fuck me, would you look at the size of him, jesus man how big are you? hey kids how fucking big is he?
would you look at the size of his muscles? and then look at the size of his fists. hey mum, come and look at the size of this fella. the kids start to feel his arms. gorgeous george plays the game and raises the kids on his biceps. micky's mum comes out to see.
would you look at the strength of the man? i bet you can box a little can't you sir? you look like a boxer.
would the big fella like a cup of tea?
good dogs, do you like dogs?
he's a good dog. he'll get a little homesick for a while but he'11 get over it. tommy has a dog that looks distressed about leaving micky sitting next to him.
the deal was you bought it how you saw it. tommy goes to interrupt but he doesn't get a chance
look, i have helped ya as much as i am gonna help ya. you still got a car and i suggest you use it before you're not welcome anymore. there is a silence for a while. the atmosphere has gone more than frosty and a few more gypsies are hanging around.
it was only a question of time before you got some attention. nobody brings a fella the size of you unless they are trying to say something without talking.
why the fuck do i want a caravan that's got no fuckin wheels? i am not going to do that.
where the fuck do you think you're going? you want to settle this with a fight?
alright mum, we shan't, we'll settle it some other way, now don't get upset.
okay mum okay. you need to sit down. micky calls to one of the lads standing by.
darren look after mum. get her sitting down. we see mum being led out by darren; micky looks genuinely concerned for his mum. pause as micky waits for her to be well gone.
i ' l l fight you for it.
how much you going to pay us?
i lose more than that running for the bus. i ' l l do it for a caravan.
no a caravan.
it's not for me, it ' s for me mum.
just make sure the man doesn't kill me before the fuckin fourth.
that depends.
on you buying this caravan. he pulls out a catalogue on fancy caravans and points to the picture of the rolls royce of caravans.
this isn't the same fight.
the fight is twice the size. and my mum still needs a new caravan.
save your breath for cooling your porridge. i'll bet you for it.
i ' l l do you a favour, you have first , bet. if i win i get the caravan, if i lose i'l l do the fight for free. turkish considers this, uneasily. he looks at the dogs they look keen and fit.
back off darren. what kind of cunt would turn up here if they knew what had happened? leave my business to me boy. darren spins on his heel
i got a message that he wanted me to fuck you two off, that's why i wanted you back. i' l l do the fight before he causes any more carnage, but i ' l l only do it if you're there.
because i know he fuckin hates ya. . 
i've felt better.
let's get on with it, shall we?
the fourth.  or was it the fifth.
well he's didn't come back to us.
well you might have noticed that we have moved, you should have fed him more, a dog will never leave you if you feed it properly. it was a good dog, he had a little flatulence problem but was a good dog.
i think i would have noticed if a fuckin dog was sitting in my caravan don't you? tommy, turkish, have you seen a dog sitting in me caravan?
see there you have it.
what the fuck's got into you lot? it's only a dog. i'l l give you another one, if it means that much to you.