son-of-a-blue-balled-bitch! i always get this one.
hannah, in order to get real answers from the netherworld, you've gotta have a christian virgin run the board. your kind is pure of heart - the devil won't dick with you.
hold up, hold up. any sentence that starts with "at church camp" ain't leading to the big "o."
anyway, last time i checked, you still had to have sex to have an orgasm. and i know she ain't seen the lord on all fours - so i'm just saying.
nope. sounds more like the first.
oh my g-d! i'm not first!
shut up, cleo. di, how much do you need for an abortion?
we're here for you, diane.
run, you bastard, run! she's hormonal!!
more proof god's a guy.
virgin mary musta snuck that one in.
hat-trick?
and we have our first pregnancy mood swing. all that's left is --
bingo.
uh, "no".  you're not fat.
stop, you're gonna make me cry.
i'm in.
i mean it. i'm in. this is the closest thing to a goddamn family that i've ever had. if one of us needs something, we all do.
shut up.
wait a minute. you watched the apple fucking-dumpling gang?!
am i the only one who cares about this? at least i watched "dog day afternoon!"
well how'd you like me to introduce my foot into your ass?
i'm sorry, diane, but i'm not gonna watch my dreams fade away 'cause the virgin mary here thinks she's gonna get ideas from kiddie movies --
you sure you wanna go there?
'cause i will jerry springer you faster than you can say "fat-assed lesbian!"
di, it's not your fault. we all wanted to do this - for you.  for ourselves.
oh - okay, we ain't done with this.  those babies are gonna get a good start in life - with a real crib - one that costs a shit-load! we're gonna learn how to rob a bank from the only people who really know how to do it - criminals! i'm gonna visit my mom!
grandma and grandpa sent you pictures of a neighbor girl. they didn't want you to break out and come kidnap me.
you shouldn't smoke so many of those.
they could kill you.
i don't hate you. i need your help.
your help.
okay, you can't tell anybody.
my best friend got pregnant.
i know - that's what i said too. anyway, we want to help her get some money for the baby by robbing a bank.
i know, but we can't quite figure out how to, y'know, do it.
oh, jesus christ, mom! like my life ain't a great big pile-of-shit 'cause you're in here? now i have to add, "p.s. my mom's a dyke" too?
hey, don't "mouthy shit" me - i'm outta here.
same time tomorrow - we have a visit with our favorite "aunts."
why?
whoever gets out alive -- have the authorities to check in the crawl space.
you're the "terminator?"
we were told you could "fix us up."
you piece-a-shit bug zapper!
look, we're not gonna trade sex for guns. unless cleo.
holy shit! that's a poster child for "planned parenthood."
sure. unless it's hard for you to talk with that stick up your ass.
don't make me jerry lewis you guys for the rest.
hey. eyes on your own belly!
you guys wanna hurry up? my grandparents get back from dinner at four-thirty.
you have three heart attacks and a half dozen strokes and tell me how much you wanna run up and down the stairs. shit - i forgot to pick up the cigarettes.
what the hell?
he ikea'd us.
screw lucy!
shit! yeah, grandma. me and the squad.
oh yeah, you caught us.
thanks! that'd be great.
uh. yeah, grandma. she doesn't mean that. kinda lost the old filter with her last stroke.
i'll get them before "touched by an angel," don't worry.
who are you - the goddamn bionic woman?!
this is great - great! now we have to enter the front door!
hey! rule number one - never take off the mask! y'hear me! no matter what happens, never take off the mask!
no-gah-buh- no! rule number two - no names! no goddamn names, you retard!
well, use your head, "stalker betty."
what the hell do you want?
okay, down on the ground! now!
i said down!
bank!
all of you!
bank branch!
bank branch only! everyone else - go on about your business!
shit - everybody down!
freeze or meet jesus, ass-hole!
disguises incinerated!
bad news, di, there's one thing we just couldn't fit in the furnace.
it was lucy! lucy went to the cops!
she's been the weak tit on this mama cat since the beginning.
that you?
just call me later. i gotta get some smokes for grandma.
for a pack of cigs? i use her food stamps.
hey lisa, did you run into carmen electra last summer?
oh. 'cause is looks like you got some of her tits in you.