look, sunshine, we found a sandwich bag of uncut cocaine -
but a fuckin' baggie.
you got caught. it's all fun and fuckin' games till you get caught. but now we gotcha. ok, mr. elliot actor, you've just made the big time -
or a bit player -
you're a fuckin' star! and you're gonna be playin' your little one-man show nightly for the next two fuckin' years for a captive audience -
and just think, when you get out in a few years, you'll meet some girl, get married, and you'll be so understanding to your wife's needs, because you'll know what it's like to be a woman.
that is, of course, if you don't catch aids from all your anal intrusions.
krinkle, you're lookin' at the two future cops of the month. we have it, and if i say we, i don't mean me and him, i'm referring to the whole department. haven't had a decent bust this whole month. well, we mighta come in like a lamb, but we're goin' out like a lion -
nicholson and i.
which wasn't too hard, the guy was a real squid.
it seems a cop from some department, we don't know where, stole a half a million dollars of coke from the property cage and he's been sittin' on it for a year and a half. now the cops got this weirdo -
to front for him. so elliot is workin' out the deal between them and his boss, a big movie producer named lee donowitz.
he's so spooked he'd turn over his momma, his daddy, his two-panny granny, and anna and the king of siam if he had anything on him.
cocaine. dirty cops. hollywood. this is crocket and tubbs all the way. and we found it, so we want the fuckin' collar.
just talk regular.
like gang-busters. now, remember, if you don't want to go to jail, we gotta put your boss in jail.
so you gotta get him to admit on tape that he's buying this coke.
you do.
how the fuck could he know?
how's he supposed to see the wire?
we gotta get him outta there.
he's bluffin ya, elliot. can't you see that? you're an actor, remember, the show must go on.
don't blow it, elliot. he's bluffin'. he just told you so himself.
convince him.
ok, let's everybody calm down and get nice. nobody has to die. we don't want it, and you don't want it.